He Got 213 Years in Prison. He Walked Out With a Vision Board.

WEBVTT

1
00:00:09.074 --> 00:00:18.480
well adam thanks for coming on happy to be here um shout out to who's a john orlando yes john orlando right shout to john orlando that said you

2
00:00:18.540 --> 00:00:28.887
need to meet this guy i'm like okay okay and i mean your story is wild and it's the thing i love about it is it's like rocky everyone loves a comeback story.

3
00:00:29.528 --> 00:00:29.728
Right?

4
00:00:30.048 --> 00:00:32.831
And you really have a comeback story.

5
00:00:33.751 --> 00:00:37.475
And so if it's okay to go through like what happened,

6
00:00:37.955 --> 00:00:39.016
what led up to it happening,

7
00:00:39.296 --> 00:00:39.877
what happened.

8
00:00:40.017 --> 00:00:41.598
And then after that,

9
00:00:41.658 --> 00:00:41.878
like,

10
00:00:42.539 --> 00:00:42.719
okay,

11
00:00:42.759 --> 00:00:45.381
this is now like set the mantra of my life.

12
00:00:45.922 --> 00:00:46.402
Basically,

13
00:00:46.482 --> 00:00:51.587
I'm going to move forward and I'm going to touch people and help them who were walking in my shoes.

14
00:00:52.127 --> 00:00:52.347
Right.

15
00:00:53.088 --> 00:00:54.409
That's pretty much it.

16
00:00:54.429 --> 00:00:55.630
It's a pretty amazing story.

17
00:00:55.650 --> 00:00:56.871
And I wake up every morning.

18
00:00:58.548 --> 00:01:02.370
like in awe that I get to live this life the way that I'm,

19
00:01:02.550 --> 00:01:03.471
that I'm leading it now.

20
00:01:03.611 --> 00:01:04.431
It's pretty amazing.

21
00:01:04.511 --> 00:01:04.651
Yeah.

22
00:01:04.832 --> 00:01:07.853
Is it something that you still like every morning,

23
00:01:07.913 --> 00:01:08.654
it's still like,

24
00:01:08.714 --> 00:01:10.695
you have that level of gratitude?

25
00:01:13.176 --> 00:01:13.616
I live,

26
00:01:13.736 --> 00:01:14.577
I say this all the time.

27
00:01:14.637 --> 00:01:21.521
I live with a different sense of gratitude than most people will ever understand because of where I've been and what I've been through.

28
00:01:21.561 --> 00:01:22.301
So yeah,

29
00:01:22.321 --> 00:01:23.802
that is always first and foremost,

30
00:01:23.862 --> 00:01:24.522
I'd lead with that.

31
00:01:24.762 --> 00:01:27.444
And my family and I end every single day with it as well.

32
00:01:27.604 --> 00:01:27.924
It's great.

33
00:01:28.416 --> 00:01:28.776
It's great.

34
00:01:29.617 --> 00:01:29.837
Okay,

35
00:01:29.917 --> 00:01:30.037
so

36
00:01:30.537 --> 00:01:33.058
Pennsylvania is where you were?

37
00:01:33.938 --> 00:01:35.099
Pennsylvania is where this started,

38
00:01:35.119 --> 00:01:35.239
yeah.

39
00:01:35.259 --> 00:01:35.499
Okay,

40
00:01:35.559 --> 00:01:36.379
so what year,

41
00:01:36.960 --> 00:01:37.640
what happened,

42
00:01:38.020 --> 00:01:39.261
bad choices got made.

43
00:01:40.321 --> 00:01:42.862
But take me back to that,

44
00:01:43.302 --> 00:01:44.023
if you don't mind.

45
00:01:44.243 --> 00:01:44.523
Sure.

46
00:01:45.923 --> 00:01:47.184
Really what started this,

47
00:01:47.185 --> 00:01:48.885
the impetus behind it was

48
00:01:49.465 --> 00:01:53.547
I was on state parole for some mistakes that I made in my youth,

49
00:01:53.687 --> 00:01:55.347
18 to 21,

50
00:01:55.348 --> 00:01:56.808
paid for those in the state.

51
00:01:57.148 --> 00:01:58.469
get out 21 years old,

52
00:01:59.730 --> 00:02:01.291
thinking that I'm going to restart my life,

53
00:02:01.811 --> 00:02:03.512
hit every imaginable wall.

54
00:02:03.853 --> 00:02:05.774
I'm 21 years old with a violent felony,

55
00:02:06.314 --> 00:02:07.255
no real education,

56
00:02:07.295 --> 00:02:08.676
no prospects for the future,

57
00:02:08.856 --> 00:02:10.397
obviously no employment history,

58
00:02:11.138 --> 00:02:12.639
and nobody wanted to give me a chance.

59
00:02:13.499 --> 00:02:15.921
So I ended up right back in the same circles,

60
00:02:15.961 --> 00:02:18.203
doing the same things that got me in trouble in the first place.

61
00:02:18.663 --> 00:02:25.748
Only this time I end up in federal court because I committed a string of robberies in downtown Philadelphia.

62
00:02:26.588 --> 00:02:28.650
And I end up,

63
00:02:29.831 --> 00:02:33.414
SWAT catches up with me one night in the middle of a robbery,

64
00:02:34.615 --> 00:02:38.979
just like what you would see in the movies and not to glamorize it or any of those things.

65
00:02:39.599 --> 00:02:40.320
It was crazy.

66
00:02:40.480 --> 00:02:40.700
Like,

67
00:02:41.080 --> 00:02:41.841
I look back,

68
00:02:41.921 --> 00:02:46.145
I think back to those times and it's like watching a movie.

69
00:02:46.146 --> 00:02:46.525
I'm like,

70
00:02:46.825 --> 00:02:48.567
what the hell was I thinking?

71
00:02:49.487 --> 00:02:49.688
But,

72
00:02:49.948 --> 00:02:50.188
you know,

73
00:02:50.189 --> 00:02:54.532
I was a young man and caught up in drugs and alcohol and just.

74
00:02:55.412 --> 00:02:59.835
running wild and feeling such a sense of hopelessness and despair.

75
00:03:00.476 --> 00:03:02.037
I really had nothing to live for.

76
00:03:02.597 --> 00:03:03.418
I'd lost my house.

77
00:03:03.419 --> 00:03:04.619
My car had been impounded.

78
00:03:05.039 --> 00:03:06.320
My phone turned off.

79
00:03:06.861 --> 00:03:08.602
I was really just trying to get by.

80
00:03:08.642 --> 00:03:16.808
I'm with this crew of guys who somehow we rationalized that it's a good idea to start knocking over these brothels.

81
00:03:17.240 --> 00:03:17.560
that are,

82
00:03:17.640 --> 00:03:17.880
you know,

83
00:03:18.020 --> 00:03:20.842
illegal houses of prostitution and gambling and drugs.

84
00:03:20.922 --> 00:03:21.342
Adam,

85
00:03:21.382 --> 00:03:21.662
hold on.

86
00:03:21.722 --> 00:03:22.442
We're in Las Vegas.

87
00:03:22.562 --> 00:03:24.743
Every fucking person here knows what a brothel is.

88
00:03:24.763 --> 00:03:25.264
You're okay.

89
00:03:25.664 --> 00:03:26.044
Yeah,

90
00:03:26.444 --> 00:03:26.744
yeah.

91
00:03:26.745 --> 00:03:29.065
There's a very safe space for you in terms of brothels.

92
00:03:29.345 --> 00:03:29.766
You're okay.

93
00:03:30.066 --> 00:03:31.807
You can go about two hours that way to Pahrump.

94
00:03:31.927 --> 00:03:32.087
Oh,

95
00:03:32.167 --> 00:03:32.287
no,

96
00:03:32.367 --> 00:03:33.207
45 minutes to Pahrump.

97
00:03:33.487 --> 00:03:34.448
But they're legit here.

98
00:03:34.488 --> 00:03:34.668
Yeah,

99
00:03:34.828 --> 00:03:35.068
true.

100
00:03:35.448 --> 00:03:36.289
Very true.

101
00:03:36.290 --> 00:03:37.709
So you were knocking,

102
00:03:37.809 --> 00:03:41.151
you were basically robbing brothels in Pennsylvania.

103
00:03:41.431 --> 00:03:42.491
Where in Pennsylvania?

104
00:03:42.932 --> 00:03:43.692
Downtown.

105
00:03:43.992 --> 00:03:44.452
Philadelphia,

106
00:03:44.632 --> 00:03:45.833
literally center city.

107
00:03:46.133 --> 00:03:46.913
I don't mean to laugh,

108
00:03:46.914 --> 00:03:47.893
but Jesus Christ,

109
00:03:48.173 --> 00:03:49.234
the worst place ever.

110
00:03:49.714 --> 00:03:54.135
It's in the shadow of city hall and the place where I was arrested.

111
00:03:54.615 --> 00:03:56.255
That street has about three of them.

112
00:03:56.736 --> 00:03:57.976
City officials are known.

113
00:03:58.376 --> 00:03:59.056
We're back then,

114
00:03:59.356 --> 00:04:00.517
allegedly,

115
00:04:00.957 --> 00:04:03.538
we're known to frequent this area.

116
00:04:05.398 --> 00:04:05.918
So again,

117
00:04:05.938 --> 00:04:06.498
in my young,

118
00:04:06.538 --> 00:04:07.159
immature thinking,

119
00:04:07.160 --> 00:04:07.459
I'm like,

120
00:04:07.979 --> 00:04:09.639
who's going to respond to this,

121
00:04:09.739 --> 00:04:09.999
right?

122
00:04:10.419 --> 00:04:12.280
Nobody wants any of this to come to light.

123
00:04:13.084 --> 00:04:13.304
Um,

124
00:04:13.384 --> 00:04:15.965
but suddenly here's SWAT laser lights,

125
00:04:16.145 --> 00:04:16.426
you know,

126
00:04:16.546 --> 00:04:17.886
coming in through the windows,

127
00:04:18.006 --> 00:04:19.087
come out with your hands up,

128
00:04:19.187 --> 00:04:19.587
all of that.

129
00:04:19.588 --> 00:04:20.047
And I'm like,

130
00:04:20.727 --> 00:04:21.007
wow,

131
00:04:21.168 --> 00:04:24.349
I literally weighed out my chances right then and there.

132
00:04:25.129 --> 00:04:28.411
Did I have enough bullets to try and get out the front door?

133
00:04:28.951 --> 00:04:31.292
This is how warped my thinking is at this time.

134
00:04:31.772 --> 00:04:32.352
And it's like,

135
00:04:33.013 --> 00:04:34.293
do I want to go back to prison?

136
00:04:35.454 --> 00:04:35.854
And I said,

137
00:04:35.855 --> 00:04:36.354
you know what?

138
00:04:36.514 --> 00:04:36.634
I'm,

139
00:04:36.914 --> 00:04:39.395
I'm going to give myself one more chance.

140
00:04:39.635 --> 00:04:40.596
I didn't think.

141
00:04:41.388 --> 00:04:43.050
things would end up the way that they did.

142
00:04:44.492 --> 00:04:46.994
But I wasn't ready to give up my life at that point.

143
00:04:47.435 --> 00:04:51.299
And that was a split second decision in that moment where I considered that briefly.

144
00:04:51.300 --> 00:04:51.639
And I'm like,

145
00:04:51.659 --> 00:04:52.400
that's crazy,

146
00:04:52.901 --> 00:04:53.081
right?

147
00:04:53.141 --> 00:04:54.182
It's crazy what I'm doing.

148
00:04:54.503 --> 00:04:56.244
And that would be an even crazier outcome.

149
00:04:56.925 --> 00:04:57.786
I'm not going to do that.

150
00:04:58.667 --> 00:04:58.927
And

151
00:04:59.917 --> 00:05:07.601
So I tried to play the Kaiser Soce thing and slip out with everybody else.

152
00:05:08.542 --> 00:05:15.325
But I had a co-defendant who was in the back and he pointed myself and others out.

153
00:05:16.106 --> 00:05:21.869
So we end up in federal court where that same co-defendant was quick to tell the FBI,

154
00:05:22.009 --> 00:05:22.589
ATF,

155
00:05:23.110 --> 00:05:24.170
anybody else who would listen,

156
00:05:24.750 --> 00:05:29.373
that there were some links between our group and organized crime.

157
00:05:30.201 --> 00:05:35.445
which at the time there was a whole task force committed to taking down this one particular group.

158
00:05:36.246 --> 00:05:42.491
And they wanted us to say that we were involved with them moving large quantities of drugs,

159
00:05:42.551 --> 00:05:45.374
which for the record is not true,

160
00:05:45.754 --> 00:05:46.615
never was true.

161
00:05:47.315 --> 00:05:48.697
But that's what they wanted us to say.

162
00:05:49.037 --> 00:05:49.597
And they said,

163
00:05:49.617 --> 00:05:52.380
you either cooperate or we're going to give you a life sentence.

164
00:05:52.840 --> 00:05:53.200
And I said,

165
00:05:53.240 --> 00:05:53.400
yeah,

166
00:05:53.561 --> 00:05:54.682
I've been through this before.

167
00:05:54.722 --> 00:05:55.602
I know this game.

168
00:05:55.983 --> 00:05:57.344
You can't possibly do that.

169
00:05:58.024 --> 00:05:58.144
Well,

170
00:05:58.145 --> 00:05:58.625
they did it.

171
00:05:59.757 --> 00:06:04.421
And I went to trial and I was sentenced to 213 years,

172
00:06:05.262 --> 00:06:06.223
no chance of parole,

173
00:06:06.383 --> 00:06:07.804
no hope of ever being released.

174
00:06:08.245 --> 00:06:09.666
In the federal system,

175
00:06:09.706 --> 00:06:10.527
you do 85%.

176
00:06:11.527 --> 00:06:13.529
So I end up with this ridiculous sentence,

177
00:06:14.010 --> 00:06:15.011
24 years old,

178
00:06:15.911 --> 00:06:16.632
life sentence,

179
00:06:16.752 --> 00:06:20.876
and I'm sent to a level six maximum security penitentiary in Allynwood in

180
00:06:21.476 --> 00:06:21.817
White Deer,

181
00:06:21.857 --> 00:06:22.317
Pennsylvania,

182
00:06:22.337 --> 00:06:22.817
a place called

183
00:06:23.338 --> 00:06:24.159
USP Allynwood.

184
00:06:24.879 --> 00:06:25.300
And,

185
00:06:25.580 --> 00:06:25.860
you know,

186
00:06:25.900 --> 00:06:26.521
that's where...

187
00:06:27.405 --> 00:06:29.426
I hit that proverbial fork in the road.

188
00:06:29.687 --> 00:06:34.629
I walked out of the yard and I had to make some split decisions on what I was going to do,

189
00:06:36.410 --> 00:06:41.293
how I was going to define those pivotal years early on,

190
00:06:42.174 --> 00:06:47.437
on who I was and ultimately who I'd become in that environment.

191
00:06:47.797 --> 00:06:47.997
Okay.

192
00:06:48.117 --> 00:06:49.198
I'm going to pause you for a second.

193
00:06:49.738 --> 00:06:50.278
That was a lot.

194
00:06:50.918 --> 00:06:51.479
That was a lot.

195
00:06:51.779 --> 00:06:52.399
As they say now,

196
00:06:52.559 --> 00:06:53.520
that was a lot to unpack,

197
00:06:54.340 --> 00:06:55.041
as the kids say.

198
00:06:56.181 --> 00:06:56.801
What year is this?

199
00:06:57.762 --> 00:06:59.102
This would be 2000.

200
00:06:59.342 --> 00:06:59.562
Okay.

201
00:07:00.063 --> 00:07:00.983
So it's 2000.

202
00:07:02.023 --> 00:07:02.864
I recently movie of the

203
00:07:03.464 --> 00:07:03.844
25th hour.

204
00:07:04.785 --> 00:07:05.025
It's a,

205
00:07:05.085 --> 00:07:09.567
it's a Spike Lee movie and it's with Edward Norton and Philip Seymour Hoffman.

206
00:07:10.287 --> 00:07:10.887
And Oh,

207
00:07:10.888 --> 00:07:13.548
the guy that played the sniper in a saving private Ryan,

208
00:07:13.588 --> 00:07:14.329
I forget his name,

209
00:07:14.849 --> 00:07:16.049
but he goes to,

210
00:07:16.089 --> 00:07:17.350
he goes to prison for,

211
00:07:17.370 --> 00:07:17.810
I think it's for,

212
00:07:17.811 --> 00:07:19.111
they found drugs in his,

213
00:07:19.331 --> 00:07:19.631
in his,

214
00:07:19.951 --> 00:07:21.552
in his apartment and it's Spike Lee.

215
00:07:21.553 --> 00:07:24.713
So it's gritty and he's a good looking guy.

216
00:07:25.285 --> 00:07:33.252
And he makes his one buddy beat the shit out of him the day before he goes away because of what could happen.

217
00:07:33.292 --> 00:07:33.932
He was going to sing,

218
00:07:33.972 --> 00:07:34.153
sing.

219
00:07:34.533 --> 00:07:36.595
So it was like to make him that way.

220
00:07:37.956 --> 00:07:38.837
You're a good looking guy.

221
00:07:39.237 --> 00:07:40.898
Like before you go in,

222
00:07:41.919 --> 00:07:42.580
what are you thinking?

223
00:07:43.581 --> 00:07:46.823
Like in terms of just being tactical,

224
00:07:47.524 --> 00:07:48.465
because you have to be,

225
00:07:48.605 --> 00:07:49.145
I would assume.

226
00:07:49.246 --> 00:07:49.506
Sure.

227
00:07:49.726 --> 00:07:49.986
Right.

228
00:07:50.286 --> 00:07:52.809
So what are you thinking before you even.

229
00:07:53.429 --> 00:07:58.271
are going into like the admitting area in terms of how you need to portray yourself,

230
00:07:58.391 --> 00:07:59.391
your body language,

231
00:07:59.511 --> 00:08:01.312
any tells you could be giving,

232
00:08:01.372 --> 00:08:01.512
like,

233
00:08:01.513 --> 00:08:03.073
cause you're getting sized up by everyone there.

234
00:08:03.173 --> 00:08:03.713
I would think.

235
00:08:04.553 --> 00:08:05.074
Absolutely.

236
00:08:05.394 --> 00:08:05.754
Absolutely.

237
00:08:05.834 --> 00:08:05.954
So,

238
00:08:07.095 --> 00:08:07.235
um,

239
00:08:08.055 --> 00:08:08.535
part of,

240
00:08:08.955 --> 00:08:09.876
to my advantage,

241
00:08:10.556 --> 00:08:11.696
and this is unfortunate,

242
00:08:11.697 --> 00:08:12.857
it's not something I'm proud of,

243
00:08:12.997 --> 00:08:14.698
but you know,

244
00:08:15.278 --> 00:08:23.001
the reputation that I had in the street somewhat preceded me and ultimately ending up with a 213 year sentence has a message.

245
00:08:23.281 --> 00:08:24.002
in itself.

246
00:08:24.642 --> 00:08:24.762
Wow,

247
00:08:24.782 --> 00:08:25.763
this is serious guy.

248
00:08:26.464 --> 00:08:26.984
What did he do?

249
00:08:27.564 --> 00:08:28.245
And there's people,

250
00:08:28.765 --> 00:08:30.307
even before I walked onto the yard,

251
00:08:30.308 --> 00:08:31.107
they had my file.

252
00:08:31.108 --> 00:08:32.008
They knew who I was.

253
00:08:32.068 --> 00:08:32.448
They knew

254
00:08:32.889 --> 00:08:33.850
I had gone to trial.

255
00:08:33.930 --> 00:08:35.951
They knew the people that I was associated with.

256
00:08:36.532 --> 00:08:38.333
So I walked in with that behind me,

257
00:08:38.794 --> 00:08:41.095
not to say that you still don't get tested,

258
00:08:41.636 --> 00:08:41.856
right?

259
00:08:41.916 --> 00:08:43.077
You have to respond to that.

260
00:08:43.597 --> 00:08:45.319
But I'm a guy who's already been in the system.

261
00:08:45.519 --> 00:08:46.039
Unfortunately,

262
00:08:46.059 --> 00:08:49.022
I got caught up in the criminal justice system at a young age.

263
00:08:49.462 --> 00:08:52.765
So I knew how to handle myself and I knew how to handle those situations.

264
00:08:53.273 --> 00:08:53.933
And I just,

265
00:08:53.934 --> 00:08:54.153
you know,

266
00:08:54.173 --> 00:08:55.134
address them head on.

267
00:08:55.954 --> 00:08:57.995
I've never been one to kind of,

268
00:08:58.115 --> 00:08:58.355
you know,

269
00:08:58.415 --> 00:08:59.336
skirt around issues.

270
00:09:00.436 --> 00:09:01.076
Just believe that,

271
00:09:01.096 --> 00:09:01.336
you know,

272
00:09:01.337 --> 00:09:02.477
when you meet things head on,

273
00:09:02.797 --> 00:09:04.938
it kind of helps to resolve it more quickly.

274
00:09:06.299 --> 00:09:07.979
One of the things is in prison,

275
00:09:08.279 --> 00:09:10.100
and especially in that environment,

276
00:09:10.120 --> 00:09:12.501
a level six maximum security penitentiary,

277
00:09:12.961 --> 00:09:14.582
like there's extreme violence.

278
00:09:14.782 --> 00:09:16.263
There's really no middle ground.

279
00:09:16.603 --> 00:09:17.283
There's not like,

280
00:09:17.663 --> 00:09:17.903
you know,

281
00:09:17.983 --> 00:09:19.204
one-on-one fistfights.

282
00:09:19.584 --> 00:09:20.885
It's just not how it works,

283
00:09:21.345 --> 00:09:21.565
right?

284
00:09:22.213 --> 00:09:23.294
If someone's going to come for you,

285
00:09:23.314 --> 00:09:24.674
it's going to be at least three people.

286
00:09:25.135 --> 00:09:30.377
It's going to be a group and they're going to come with knives and it's like your life is on the line.

287
00:09:31.018 --> 00:09:32.658
So if it gets to that point,

288
00:09:33.499 --> 00:09:34.319
you got problems.

289
00:09:35.860 --> 00:09:36.580
But generally,

290
00:09:37.121 --> 00:09:43.764
if you can establish yourself before that by other means and it doesn't get to the extreme violence point,

291
00:09:43.824 --> 00:09:45.325
you're going to be okay.

292
00:09:46.142 --> 00:09:51.564
So I was able to carve out some space and I had some good people that looked out for me when I got there.

293
00:09:52.204 --> 00:09:52.444
You know,

294
00:09:52.604 --> 00:09:54.845
other lifers who knew who I was,

295
00:09:55.045 --> 00:09:58.346
who literally made space for me and allowed me.

296
00:09:59.046 --> 00:10:05.348
I like my experience was different than a lot of people who end up in those situations because of my background,

297
00:10:05.388 --> 00:10:06.748
because of the reputation that I had.

298
00:10:07.088 --> 00:10:10.849
And because of the people who then made a path for me.

299
00:10:11.529 --> 00:10:11.749
Right.

300
00:10:11.929 --> 00:10:13.710
Things could have gone very differently.

301
00:10:14.110 --> 00:10:15.511
And I think back about that now.

302
00:10:15.551 --> 00:10:15.811
I say,

303
00:10:16.131 --> 00:10:17.512
I'm here by divine design,

304
00:10:18.152 --> 00:10:18.392
right?

305
00:10:18.472 --> 00:10:19.873
Like I had to do my part,

306
00:10:20.574 --> 00:10:26.297
but I look back in the like catastrophes that I somehow managed to avoid,

307
00:10:26.337 --> 00:10:28.338
like large scale riots where I was like,

308
00:10:29.078 --> 00:10:30.059
I was right there.

309
00:10:30.339 --> 00:10:32.080
I was on the front line,

310
00:10:32.081 --> 00:10:32.360
you know,

311
00:10:32.741 --> 00:10:34.081
knives in both hands,

312
00:10:34.161 --> 00:10:35.062
like going,

313
00:10:35.162 --> 00:10:36.543
what am I doing here?

314
00:10:36.643 --> 00:10:37.583
I don't want to be here,

315
00:10:38.404 --> 00:10:42.106
but those are like the situations that you find yourself in prison.

316
00:10:42.466 --> 00:10:42.906
And you're going,

317
00:10:42.946 --> 00:10:43.427
dear God,

318
00:10:43.467 --> 00:10:43.687
man,

319
00:10:44.207 --> 00:10:48.190
I hope we can talk this thing out because people are going to die.

320
00:10:48.810 --> 00:10:54.474
And I had watched those situations explode and been so fortunate over the years.

321
00:10:54.995 --> 00:10:58.037
That first 10 years that I spent there in that environment,

322
00:10:59.578 --> 00:11:01.239
somehow it became normalized.

323
00:11:01.759 --> 00:11:03.781
Like you just learn to,

324
00:11:04.541 --> 00:11:06.262
you're tuned in at a different frequency,

325
00:11:07.023 --> 00:11:07.263
right?

326
00:11:07.763 --> 00:11:08.204
It's like,

327
00:11:08.604 --> 00:11:09.725
I like to use the analogy.

328
00:11:09.805 --> 00:11:11.246
It's like when you live by the...

329
00:11:11.746 --> 00:11:12.947
high power lines,

330
00:11:13.027 --> 00:11:13.247
right?

331
00:11:13.487 --> 00:11:14.388
And you hear that buzz,

332
00:11:14.408 --> 00:11:15.328
you pull up and you're like,

333
00:11:16.649 --> 00:11:16.950
you're like,

334
00:11:16.990 --> 00:11:17.250
man,

335
00:11:17.530 --> 00:11:18.551
how do you live here?

336
00:11:19.692 --> 00:11:19.852
Like,

337
00:11:19.853 --> 00:11:20.152
you don't,

338
00:11:20.332 --> 00:11:21.453
that doesn't drive you crazy.

339
00:11:21.873 --> 00:11:22.293
And you're like,

340
00:11:22.854 --> 00:11:23.914
the person that lives there goes,

341
00:11:24.135 --> 00:11:25.355
I don't even hear it anymore.

342
00:11:25.415 --> 00:11:25.596
Like,

343
00:11:25.616 --> 00:11:25.996
it's just,

344
00:11:26.076 --> 00:11:26.736
it's white noise,

345
00:11:26.776 --> 00:11:27.417
it's background.

346
00:11:28.277 --> 00:11:29.518
That's what it becomes in prison.

347
00:11:30.039 --> 00:11:31.720
Things vibrate at a different level.

348
00:11:32.160 --> 00:11:36.063
And there's always this level of tension that's just like,

349
00:11:36.743 --> 00:11:39.605
you just have to be conscious of it and you learn how to operate within it.

350
00:11:40.974 --> 00:11:45.516
But you don't realize when you're living it,

351
00:11:46.236 --> 00:11:48.697
what it does to you because you become desensitized.

352
00:11:48.917 --> 00:11:50.518
And then you move to a different environment.

353
00:11:50.558 --> 00:11:52.399
People are like,

354
00:11:52.559 --> 00:11:53.019
what the heck?

355
00:11:53.020 --> 00:11:55.140
Like you're buzzing and everybody else is like,

356
00:11:55.160 --> 00:11:55.600
whoa,

357
00:11:55.900 --> 00:11:56.120
man,

358
00:11:56.180 --> 00:11:57.161
what's wrong with you?

359
00:11:58.381 --> 00:12:00.442
So I had to experience that part as well.

360
00:12:00.942 --> 00:12:02.523
When I finally did leave that environment,

361
00:12:02.583 --> 00:12:03.503
I didn't want to leave.

362
00:12:04.364 --> 00:12:05.484
That's how crazy that sounds.

363
00:12:05.984 --> 00:12:08.646
Because here I am in a level six maximum security penitentiary,

364
00:12:09.286 --> 00:12:09.706
the most...

365
00:12:09.866 --> 00:12:12.128
peaceful I have been in my entire life.

366
00:12:12.508 --> 00:12:14.530
I learned how to live within that frequency.

367
00:12:15.210 --> 00:12:19.134
I am literally doing my meditation.

368
00:12:19.234 --> 00:12:26.019
I'm out in the yard doing morning sunrise yoga with who's who of American gangsters are out there.

369
00:12:26.079 --> 00:12:27.220
You know what I mean?

370
00:12:27.641 --> 00:12:32.625
Everybody's got their own space carved out and things were flowing pretty smooth.

371
00:12:33.145 --> 00:12:33.666
And I'm like,

372
00:12:35.007 --> 00:12:36.408
I can breathe.

373
00:12:36.888 --> 00:12:38.850
I've finally figured out who I am.

374
00:12:39.498 --> 00:12:42.179
I find my passion for all things health and wellness related.

375
00:12:42.939 --> 00:12:44.659
I'm sharing this passion with others,

376
00:12:44.699 --> 00:12:45.900
developing a sense of purpose.

377
00:12:45.901 --> 00:12:46.240
I'm like,

378
00:12:47.060 --> 00:12:47.740
I'm good.

379
00:12:48.721 --> 00:12:52.321
And then with all great comeback stories,

380
00:12:52.341 --> 00:12:52.902
there's a woman,

381
00:12:53.582 --> 00:12:53.862
right?

382
00:12:54.562 --> 00:12:57.443
I meet a woman and that changes everything.

383
00:12:57.983 --> 00:12:58.543
It always does.

384
00:12:59.523 --> 00:13:00.444
And usually for the better.

385
00:13:00.944 --> 00:13:01.524
We share that,

386
00:13:02.124 --> 00:13:04.125
that we both have amazing women in our lives.

387
00:13:04.265 --> 00:13:05.445
We'll get to that one.

388
00:13:06.765 --> 00:13:08.746
When you were inside,

389
00:13:09.662 --> 00:13:13.084
Was it something that when you said like you reached kind of like this flow state,

390
00:13:13.324 --> 00:13:13.644
I guess,

391
00:13:13.724 --> 00:13:14.244
not your words,

392
00:13:14.264 --> 00:13:14.944
I'm paraphrasing,

393
00:13:14.964 --> 00:13:16.145
but kind of like a flow state where you're,

394
00:13:16.465 --> 00:13:16.705
you know,

395
00:13:17.525 --> 00:13:18.706
doing down dog with,

396
00:13:19.026 --> 00:13:19.266
you know,

397
00:13:19.346 --> 00:13:20.307
John Gotti or whoever,

398
00:13:20.427 --> 00:13:20.647
right?

399
00:13:21.347 --> 00:13:25.149
Whoever's there and probably not because he was in a different facility and he was probably dead.

400
00:13:25.329 --> 00:13:31.852
But it's like you have this heightened sense,

401
00:13:31.972 --> 00:13:32.132
this,

402
00:13:32.152 --> 00:13:32.372
you know,

403
00:13:32.432 --> 00:13:33.092
vibration,

404
00:13:33.152 --> 00:13:34.813
this vibratory thing going on,

405
00:13:35.213 --> 00:13:35.873
but also just like,

406
00:13:35.933 --> 00:13:36.193
okay,

407
00:13:36.614 --> 00:13:37.154
here's my day.

408
00:13:38.078 --> 00:13:39.679
And this is how I'm going to live my life right now,

409
00:13:40.039 --> 00:13:40.279
right?

410
00:13:40.819 --> 00:13:42.961
Is that kind of how it was and for 20 years?

411
00:13:44.221 --> 00:13:44.341
Well,

412
00:13:44.361 --> 00:13:47.043
this is the first 10 years that I'm in that environment.

413
00:13:47.283 --> 00:13:47.823
And I remember,

414
00:13:48.283 --> 00:13:49.284
this is telling,

415
00:13:49.384 --> 00:13:49.604
right?

416
00:13:49.784 --> 00:13:51.305
So I worked up in recreation.

417
00:13:51.945 --> 00:13:55.467
And there were times when everyone else is inside like for count,

418
00:13:55.888 --> 00:13:56.768
but working in rec,

419
00:13:56.928 --> 00:13:58.689
those of us who are up there in the gym,

420
00:13:59.630 --> 00:14:01.250
we're up there putting up weights,

421
00:14:01.310 --> 00:14:01.771
cleaning up,

422
00:14:01.851 --> 00:14:02.491
doing that stuff.

423
00:14:02.771 --> 00:14:04.032
It was a great job to have.

424
00:14:04.372 --> 00:14:05.813
And I taught all these fitness classes,

425
00:14:05.873 --> 00:14:06.053
right?

426
00:14:06.173 --> 00:14:07.434
Literally taught thousands of men.

427
00:14:07.474 --> 00:14:07.734
And like,

428
00:14:07.914 --> 00:14:09.135
where else would I get to do this?

429
00:14:09.875 --> 00:14:11.075
And when we were done,

430
00:14:11.355 --> 00:14:14.197
I'd get to come out on the yard and there's nobody else out on the yard at this time.

431
00:14:14.597 --> 00:14:17.818
So we have like 10 minutes before they call the move and everybody else comes out.

432
00:14:18.298 --> 00:14:19.659
Me and another guy that I work with,

433
00:14:19.699 --> 00:14:20.839
we're just out strolling,

434
00:14:20.940 --> 00:14:21.680
shirts off,

435
00:14:21.760 --> 00:14:24.481
like not a care in the world,

436
00:14:24.541 --> 00:14:24.701
right?

437
00:14:24.702 --> 00:14:25.001
We're like,

438
00:14:25.021 --> 00:14:25.922
how great is this?

439
00:14:25.982 --> 00:14:26.782
It's summertime.

440
00:14:27.122 --> 00:14:27.822
And I remember this,

441
00:14:28.002 --> 00:14:28.863
a unit manager,

442
00:14:29.763 --> 00:14:30.544
position of authority,

443
00:14:31.024 --> 00:14:33.125
guy's walking through and he stops and And he goes,

444
00:14:33.525 --> 00:14:34.165
look at you guys,

445
00:14:34.225 --> 00:14:34.445
man.

446
00:14:35.206 --> 00:14:35.506
He's like,

447
00:14:35.526 --> 00:14:35.786
Klaus,

448
00:14:35.906 --> 00:14:36.086
man.

449
00:14:36.434 --> 00:14:37.817
You belong in a beach somewhere,

450
00:14:37.978 --> 00:14:38.218
like,

451
00:14:38.559 --> 00:14:38.840
you know,

452
00:14:38.960 --> 00:14:40.604
down south in the Caribbean,

453
00:14:40.804 --> 00:14:41.486
someplace,

454
00:14:41.686 --> 00:14:42.889
any place but here,

455
00:14:42.989 --> 00:14:43.230
man.

456
00:14:44.128 --> 00:14:46.450
And that was like,

457
00:14:46.490 --> 00:14:48.011
there was something that he saw.

458
00:14:48.652 --> 00:14:50.654
And I heard what he said very clearly,

459
00:14:50.734 --> 00:14:51.014
like,

460
00:14:51.755 --> 00:14:52.695
this is not for you,

461
00:14:52.835 --> 00:14:52.996
man.

462
00:14:53.056 --> 00:14:54.677
Like I picture you someplace else.

463
00:14:55.197 --> 00:14:56.599
And I always held onto that.

464
00:14:56.759 --> 00:14:59.721
I was very conscious about like,

465
00:15:00.062 --> 00:15:00.342
you see,

466
00:15:00.382 --> 00:15:01.363
I'm not all tatted up,

467
00:15:02.243 --> 00:15:03.945
which is an anomaly as well.

468
00:15:04.806 --> 00:15:05.066
And

469
00:15:05.526 --> 00:15:09.590
I knew that if I was ever going to earn a second chance,

470
00:15:10.090 --> 00:15:11.992
I'd have to do all of these things.

471
00:15:12.716 --> 00:15:15.257
that would allow someone to get behind me,

472
00:15:15.258 --> 00:15:16.998
to put a signature on a piece of paper,

473
00:15:17.078 --> 00:15:18.598
because ultimately that's what it comes down to,

474
00:15:18.698 --> 00:15:18.939
right?

475
00:15:19.619 --> 00:15:20.419
But I also,

476
00:15:21.360 --> 00:15:25.781
I had to be perceived as someone worthy of that second chance.

477
00:15:26.342 --> 00:15:26.942
You look at me,

478
00:15:27.502 --> 00:15:29.883
I know that I'm a decent looking guy,

479
00:15:30.443 --> 00:15:31.944
that in this environment,

480
00:15:31.984 --> 00:15:33.284
people look at me and they just go,

481
00:15:34.545 --> 00:15:35.945
you don't fit here.

482
00:15:36.626 --> 00:15:38.827
And I had to use that as a strength,

483
00:15:38.907 --> 00:15:39.167
right?

484
00:15:39.587 --> 00:15:41.648
As much as it could have very easily

485
00:15:42.276 --> 00:15:46.558
become a point of weakness where people would want to try and take advantage of me.

486
00:15:47.338 --> 00:15:49.639
I had to do other things to counter that.

487
00:15:49.959 --> 00:15:52.460
So it's this fine line.

488
00:15:52.540 --> 00:15:53.461
I know how I look,

489
00:15:54.401 --> 00:15:55.161
but when needed,

490
00:15:55.381 --> 00:15:56.662
I played a lot of sports in prison.

491
00:15:57.302 --> 00:15:58.943
People joke around about prison rules,

492
00:15:59.003 --> 00:15:59.483
basketball.

493
00:16:00.403 --> 00:16:00.824
It's real.

494
00:16:01.444 --> 00:16:01.784
It's real,

495
00:16:01.844 --> 00:16:02.024
right?

496
00:16:02.044 --> 00:16:07.786
There's guys standing on the sidelines with their knives ready to go and hyper-aggressive.

497
00:16:08.427 --> 00:16:10.127
I've got a great stiff arm.

498
00:16:10.548 --> 00:16:11.288
That's not usually...

499
00:16:11.844 --> 00:16:12.124
you know,

500
00:16:12.584 --> 00:16:14.125
employed in basketball,

501
00:16:14.786 --> 00:16:15.686
but that's what you got to do.

502
00:16:15.786 --> 00:16:16.607
You're going to the,

503
00:16:16.608 --> 00:16:17.307
going to the rim.

504
00:16:17.927 --> 00:16:18.168
You know,

505
00:16:18.169 --> 00:16:20.829
we're playing full contact basketball.

506
00:16:21.489 --> 00:16:21.770
Um,

507
00:16:22.170 --> 00:16:23.911
and there were things that I did basketball,

508
00:16:23.971 --> 00:16:24.431
believe it or not,

509
00:16:24.432 --> 00:16:25.552
we played hockey in prison.

510
00:16:26.032 --> 00:16:26.272
Really?

511
00:16:26.512 --> 00:16:26.692
Yeah.

512
00:16:27.333 --> 00:16:27.453
Yep.

513
00:16:27.773 --> 00:16:28.853
Played some hockey in prison,

514
00:16:28.974 --> 00:16:29.554
floor hockey,

515
00:16:29.654 --> 00:16:33.016
which you can imagine pretty aggressive as well.

516
00:16:33.256 --> 00:16:35.197
Split my head from here to here.

517
00:16:35.297 --> 00:16:36.238
Jesus Christ.

518
00:16:36.298 --> 00:16:36.838
Wide open.

519
00:16:36.938 --> 00:16:37.218
Adam.

520
00:16:37.338 --> 00:16:37.658
Okay.

521
00:16:38.359 --> 00:16:38.939
Wow.

522
00:16:39.039 --> 00:16:39.539
Wow.

523
00:16:39.920 --> 00:16:40.380
But it was,

524
00:16:40.920 --> 00:16:43.741
By displaying that aggression openly,

525
00:16:44.522 --> 00:16:44.962
often,

526
00:16:46.162 --> 00:16:48.083
people knew to give me space.

527
00:16:49.604 --> 00:16:55.266
And I cultivated that physical strength along with a mental confidence to back it up.

528
00:16:56.687 --> 00:16:58.387
And it served me well.

529
00:16:58.567 --> 00:17:00.468
And those are things that

530
00:17:01.028 --> 00:17:05.170
I developed in there that have served me well on the outside as well.

531
00:17:05.590 --> 00:17:06.971
So let's talk about that.

532
00:17:07.491 --> 00:17:09.152
to bring closure a little bit to...

533
00:17:09.492 --> 00:17:09.732
you know,

534
00:17:09.752 --> 00:17:10.773
to your past past,

535
00:17:11.433 --> 00:17:12.994
tell me about the day that you got out,

536
00:17:13.695 --> 00:17:14.375
what that was like.

537
00:17:14.495 --> 00:17:14.615
Oh,

538
00:17:14.616 --> 00:17:15.636
the day that I got out.

539
00:17:15.796 --> 00:17:19.619
So fast forward that the first 10 years was in that maximum security.

540
00:17:20.339 --> 00:17:23.301
I spent the next 10 years in a medium security.

541
00:17:23.541 --> 00:17:23.882
Really?

542
00:17:24.282 --> 00:17:27.224
Which was like night and day difference.

543
00:17:28.125 --> 00:17:28.265
Yeah.

544
00:17:29.265 --> 00:17:32.868
And it was to kind of put this in perspective.

545
00:17:32.869 --> 00:17:34.829
I told you I was vibrating at a different frequency.

546
00:17:36.390 --> 00:17:37.051
I get there and I'm,

547
00:17:37.251 --> 00:17:38.852
I'm in this new facility for like,

548
00:17:39.612 --> 00:17:39.772
well,

549
00:17:40.353 --> 00:17:41.534
the first day that I'm there,

550
00:17:41.854 --> 00:17:49.721
I hear chairs like moving on the floor and I'm in a cell with this guy and I jump up and I go to the door and I look out and he's like,

551
00:17:49.961 --> 00:17:50.141
well,

552
00:17:50.902 --> 00:17:51.602
like what's going on,

553
00:17:51.642 --> 00:17:51.843
man?

554
00:17:52.223 --> 00:17:52.543
I'm like,

555
00:17:52.583 --> 00:17:53.084
did you hear that?

556
00:17:53.444 --> 00:17:53.964
The chairs?

557
00:17:54.024 --> 00:17:54.445
Like what's,

558
00:17:54.685 --> 00:17:55.506
what's going on out there?

559
00:17:56.106 --> 00:17:56.707
Like to me,

560
00:17:57.507 --> 00:17:58.548
when chairs are moving,

561
00:17:59.008 --> 00:17:59.769
something's happening.

562
00:18:00.129 --> 00:18:01.290
Like there's a situation.

563
00:18:01.991 --> 00:18:02.131
Um,

564
00:18:02.191 --> 00:18:02.551
so I'm,

565
00:18:03.412 --> 00:18:03.953
and people are like,

566
00:18:03.973 --> 00:18:04.473
Whoa,

567
00:18:04.733 --> 00:18:05.414
this guy's a little,

568
00:18:05.474 --> 00:18:06.415
he's a little high strung.

569
00:18:06.915 --> 00:18:07.796
I don't see it.

570
00:18:08.292 --> 00:18:08.712
But I'm like,

571
00:18:08.732 --> 00:18:09.912
this is what I'm conditioned to.

572
00:18:10.773 --> 00:18:11.713
I go out on a visit.

573
00:18:11.913 --> 00:18:14.094
My mom brings my aunt and my uncle up.

574
00:18:15.954 --> 00:18:16.834
They left and they said,

575
00:18:16.854 --> 00:18:18.035
we are never coming back.

576
00:18:18.555 --> 00:18:19.315
He's not all right.

577
00:18:20.895 --> 00:18:21.556
He's not all right.

578
00:18:21.916 --> 00:18:22.596
He's not well.

579
00:18:22.896 --> 00:18:23.976
He's not ready to come home.

580
00:18:25.457 --> 00:18:29.058
And what they sensed was that energy where

581
00:18:29.798 --> 00:18:31.999
I'm now in a room where there's a lot of movement,

582
00:18:31.1000 --> 00:18:32.719
a lot of people.

583
00:18:33.519 --> 00:18:34.679
I'm hyper alert,

584
00:18:35.179 --> 00:18:36.860
hypersensitive to all these things.

585
00:18:37.324 --> 00:18:39.446
And they're sensing that energy and they're like,

586
00:18:39.686 --> 00:18:39.866
whoa,

587
00:18:40.947 --> 00:18:42.088
what is wrong with him?

588
00:18:43.329 --> 00:18:44.670
And to me,

589
00:18:44.710 --> 00:18:45.830
that was an important message.

590
00:18:45.871 --> 00:18:46.711
I needed to hear that.

591
00:18:46.731 --> 00:18:47.592
When my mom told me,

592
00:18:48.112 --> 00:18:48.372
you know,

593
00:18:49.573 --> 00:18:51.034
they were kind of freaked out by you.

594
00:18:51.535 --> 00:18:51.895
And I'm like,

595
00:18:51.955 --> 00:18:52.195
what?

596
00:18:52.676 --> 00:18:53.576
I got defensive,

597
00:18:54.097 --> 00:18:54.557
naturally.

598
00:18:55.098 --> 00:18:55.678
But then I'm like,

599
00:18:57.199 --> 00:18:57.519
hold on,

600
00:18:58.560 --> 00:19:00.562
let me really assess this.

601
00:19:01.362 --> 00:19:03.444
And I started talking to some of the men around me.

602
00:19:04.172 --> 00:19:08.235
Guys that I had known who had been in higher security had come down and they're like,

603
00:19:08.896 --> 00:19:10.056
it's an adjustment phase.

604
00:19:10.517 --> 00:19:10.717
Like,

605
00:19:11.497 --> 00:19:11.678
yeah,

606
00:19:11.898 --> 00:19:12.558
we see it.

607
00:19:14.059 --> 00:19:16.661
You got to kind of dial it down and it'll take a little bit of time.

608
00:19:16.662 --> 00:19:17.041
And I'm like,

609
00:19:17.142 --> 00:19:17.502
whoa.

610
00:19:19.023 --> 00:19:20.064
It was that realization.

611
00:19:20.224 --> 00:19:22.365
I knew that in order for me,

612
00:19:22.565 --> 00:19:23.046
again,

613
00:19:23.526 --> 00:19:24.307
looking forward,

614
00:19:24.567 --> 00:19:26.228
if someone's going to get behind me,

615
00:19:26.789 --> 00:19:28.430
these are things that I need to address.

616
00:19:30.231 --> 00:19:31.172
Some men never do.

617
00:19:32.472 --> 00:19:34.415
Some men never fully recover from that.

618
00:19:35.616 --> 00:19:38.981
And there's a number of years that I saw when people got 20 years in,

619
00:19:40.363 --> 00:19:41.144
they tend to kind of...

620
00:19:41.987 --> 00:19:45.349
There's things that happen to you from living that long in those environments.

621
00:19:45.649 --> 00:19:46.430
For most people,

622
00:19:47.050 --> 00:19:48.371
I was consciously aware of that.

623
00:19:48.372 --> 00:19:48.711
And I said,

624
00:19:48.731 --> 00:19:48.951
listen,

625
00:19:49.031 --> 00:19:50.372
these are things that I need to counter.

626
00:19:51.152 --> 00:19:51.853
I want to go home.

627
00:19:52.733 --> 00:19:53.994
I have this vision for the future,

628
00:19:54.034 --> 00:19:55.095
for this family that I want,

629
00:19:55.115 --> 00:19:56.355
for this woman that I want to be with.

630
00:19:56.936 --> 00:19:58.537
And for myself,

631
00:19:58.877 --> 00:19:59.317
for her,

632
00:19:59.617 --> 00:20:01.418
for that future and that family,

633
00:20:02.119 --> 00:20:03.780
I need to start taking action,

634
00:20:04.180 --> 00:20:08.983
being proactive and really focusing on myself and what do I need to do to get to that place.

635
00:20:09.363 --> 00:20:11.043
That got me into life coaching,

636
00:20:11.284 --> 00:20:13.424
working with a guy named Dr.

637
00:20:13.464 --> 00:20:16.305
Patrick Williams at the forefront of the positive psychology movement,

638
00:20:16.365 --> 00:20:17.205
therapist to coach,

639
00:20:17.245 --> 00:20:18.426
became a certified coach,

640
00:20:19.466 --> 00:20:20.466
changes my life,

641
00:20:20.946 --> 00:20:22.227
changes the way that I communicate,

642
00:20:22.247 --> 00:20:23.207
not only with my wife,

643
00:20:23.247 --> 00:20:24.447
but everybody else.

644
00:20:25.067 --> 00:20:27.808
And I started training other men in there to become coaches.

645
00:20:28.548 --> 00:20:34.130
And I built the support that I needed to become that person.

646
00:20:35.791 --> 00:20:37.271
People that I could trust.

647
00:20:37.843 --> 00:20:39.144
to give me the feedback,

648
00:20:39.624 --> 00:20:40.205
to tell me,

649
00:20:40.705 --> 00:20:40.906
like,

650
00:20:40.946 --> 00:20:41.246
listen,

651
00:20:42.407 --> 00:20:43.708
these are things you need to address.

652
00:20:43.908 --> 00:20:44.128
Right.

653
00:20:45.389 --> 00:20:46.230
Honest feedback.

654
00:20:46.470 --> 00:20:48.071
And we did that for one another.

655
00:20:48.832 --> 00:20:58.340
And it was that community that was built around it that became instrumental in me really starting to live into my full potential.

656
00:20:59.301 --> 00:20:59.781
And then,

657
00:21:00.722 --> 00:21:02.403
as all of us are developing,

658
00:21:02.443 --> 00:21:02.643
like,

659
00:21:03.044 --> 00:21:04.545
this gains national attention.

660
00:21:05.326 --> 00:21:06.707
We start getting people to come in.

661
00:21:07.171 --> 00:21:12.314
And it's really through that work that people start to take notice.

662
00:21:13.254 --> 00:21:16.937
And they're finally starting to get behind me in a meaningful way and say,

663
00:21:16.938 --> 00:21:17.377
you know what?

664
00:21:18.237 --> 00:21:21.539
We normally don't do this as a warden or associate warden.

665
00:21:21.979 --> 00:21:23.720
I'm going to give you a letter of recommendation,

666
00:21:23.800 --> 00:21:26.682
like acknowledging the incredible work that you're doing in here.

667
00:21:26.683 --> 00:21:27.122
That's great.

668
00:21:28.863 --> 00:21:30.324
I'm going to push on something.

669
00:21:31.004 --> 00:21:35.527
Walk me through your first day when you walked out of the medium security.

670
00:21:35.847 --> 00:21:38.988
facility when it was like your first day of freedom in 20 years.

671
00:21:39.828 --> 00:21:44.469
That's something I've been thinking about with you because you've been in there for so long and you've gone from,

672
00:21:45.230 --> 00:21:45.490
you know,

673
00:21:45.730 --> 00:21:46.830
extremely high energy,

674
00:21:47.010 --> 00:21:47.270
you know,

675
00:21:47.690 --> 00:21:48.251
where you've got to be,

676
00:21:48.331 --> 00:21:48.571
you know,

677
00:21:49.091 --> 00:21:51.471
ultra sensory going and then a little,

678
00:21:51.511 --> 00:21:52.372
you dial it down,

679
00:21:52.592 --> 00:21:53.652
but it's still there a little bit.

680
00:21:53.653 --> 00:21:54.132
It has to be.

681
00:21:54.192 --> 00:21:56.213
It's still a controlled environment for you to,

682
00:21:57.273 --> 00:21:58.053
you're basically free.

683
00:21:59.954 --> 00:22:03.675
Walk me through what you were feeling and what happened that day.

684
00:22:05.243 --> 00:22:05.823
So the day

685
00:22:06.423 --> 00:22:08.704
I get the news that I'm granted immediate release,

686
00:22:09.264 --> 00:22:09.884
should be like,

687
00:22:11.425 --> 00:22:12.645
I dreamed of this,

688
00:22:12.745 --> 00:22:13.025
right?

689
00:22:13.905 --> 00:22:17.486
Was a little bit anticlimactic because it's like immediate release,

690
00:22:18.047 --> 00:22:19.727
but we need to get this thing signed.

691
00:22:19.728 --> 00:22:21.227
So it got dragged out a little bit,

692
00:22:22.048 --> 00:22:23.668
but eventually I get the phone call.

693
00:22:23.669 --> 00:22:24.428
The call comes,

694
00:22:24.508 --> 00:22:25.069
Clausen.

695
00:22:26.149 --> 00:22:26.469
I'm like,

696
00:22:26.649 --> 00:22:27.089
oh my God,

697
00:22:27.109 --> 00:22:27.509
that's it.

698
00:22:27.909 --> 00:22:28.329
That's it.

699
00:22:29.110 --> 00:22:29.590
I grabbed my,

700
00:22:30.190 --> 00:22:30.310
so

701
00:22:30.790 --> 00:22:33.731
I walk out of there with a cart filled with my books.

702
00:22:34.291 --> 00:22:34.851
notebooks.

703
00:22:35.131 --> 00:22:36.852
There were things that I was taking home with me.

704
00:22:36.853 --> 00:22:37.912
I got a vision board,

705
00:22:38.192 --> 00:22:38.852
the whole works.

706
00:22:39.372 --> 00:22:42.113
Things that should have never survived in prison,

707
00:22:42.833 --> 00:22:43.734
I'm taking them home with me.

708
00:22:44.134 --> 00:22:46.514
So I get my little cart and I'm going across the compound.

709
00:22:46.874 --> 00:22:47.475
And it's COVID,

710
00:22:47.476 --> 00:22:48.575
so everybody's locked down.

711
00:22:49.115 --> 00:22:51.856
But there's men yelling out the windows,

712
00:22:53.816 --> 00:22:54.977
banging.

713
00:22:55.577 --> 00:22:56.877
They all see me with my cart.

714
00:22:57.037 --> 00:22:59.338
I'm not a low profile guy.

715
00:22:59.438 --> 00:22:59.918
I love it.

716
00:23:00.218 --> 00:23:01.538
I'm a very high profile guy,

717
00:23:01.678 --> 00:23:01.958
right?

718
00:23:02.519 --> 00:23:03.479
and everyone.

719
00:23:04.511 --> 00:23:05.892
And that's something that should be noted,

720
00:23:06.032 --> 00:23:06.332
right?

721
00:23:07.213 --> 00:23:08.093
There were no haters.

722
00:23:08.573 --> 00:23:10.674
People were so happy for me.

723
00:23:11.795 --> 00:23:14.777
Even the other guys who still had life sentences,

724
00:23:15.377 --> 00:23:15.777
they're like,

725
00:23:15.837 --> 00:23:16.137
man,

726
00:23:16.277 --> 00:23:16.998
go do it.

727
00:23:17.518 --> 00:23:19.039
I know if you're out there,

728
00:23:19.439 --> 00:23:20.240
I got a shot.

729
00:23:21.040 --> 00:23:21.160
So

730
00:23:21.680 --> 00:23:22.781
I get to the front door.

731
00:23:23.121 --> 00:23:25.763
They bring me down very unceremoniously.

732
00:23:25.843 --> 00:23:27.283
They're just open the door,

733
00:23:27.624 --> 00:23:28.764
leave me and close it.

734
00:23:28.765 --> 00:23:29.104
And I'm like,

735
00:23:29.985 --> 00:23:30.185
okay,

736
00:23:30.705 --> 00:23:31.206
now what?

737
00:23:31.606 --> 00:23:33.327
It's not like you can walk anywhere.

738
00:23:33.487 --> 00:23:33.787
I'm not...

739
00:23:34.091 --> 00:23:35.372
on the street in the middle of a city.

740
00:23:35.692 --> 00:23:37.193
There's no like exit interview.

741
00:23:37.453 --> 00:23:37.593
Well,

742
00:23:37.653 --> 00:23:38.173
how do we do?

743
00:23:38.634 --> 00:23:39.394
Zero to 10.

744
00:23:40.134 --> 00:23:41.855
You'll be getting something from us in an email.

745
00:23:42.195 --> 00:23:44.117
Please give us a 10 out of 10 on everything.

746
00:23:44.537 --> 00:23:45.797
That's a good recommendation.

747
00:23:45.958 --> 00:23:46.278
Right?

748
00:23:46.298 --> 00:23:46.838
We should do that.

749
00:23:46.898 --> 00:23:47.158
Right?

750
00:23:47.618 --> 00:23:48.119
I mean,

751
00:23:48.139 --> 00:23:48.819
it's not like that.

752
00:23:48.839 --> 00:23:49.139
It's like,

753
00:23:49.179 --> 00:23:49.559
fuck you.

754
00:23:49.700 --> 00:23:50.360
We're done here.

755
00:23:50.800 --> 00:23:50.940
Yeah.

756
00:23:51.280 --> 00:23:51.601
You know,

757
00:23:52.501 --> 00:23:53.041
good luck to you.

758
00:23:53.042 --> 00:23:53.842
I don't want to see you again.

759
00:23:53.843 --> 00:23:54.202
Get out.

760
00:23:54.722 --> 00:23:55.123
Get out.

761
00:23:55.623 --> 00:23:55.883
Right?

762
00:23:56.443 --> 00:23:56.743
Get out.

763
00:23:56.744 --> 00:23:57.144
And I'm like,

764
00:23:57.264 --> 00:23:57.404
what?

765
00:23:58.024 --> 00:23:58.664
I've got a cart.

766
00:23:58.825 --> 00:23:59.185
Like what?

767
00:23:59.325 --> 00:23:59.745
I'm waiting.

768
00:23:59.746 --> 00:24:00.305
I'm waiting.

769
00:24:00.766 --> 00:24:03.167
I think that they've called my.

770
00:24:03.671 --> 00:24:04.451
then fiance.

771
00:24:04.992 --> 00:24:06.012
I think that they've called her.

772
00:24:06.472 --> 00:24:08.533
She's been holed up at a hotel in town,

773
00:24:08.893 --> 00:24:13.315
the same place for the last 10 years where she has gone and spent the weekends,

774
00:24:13.795 --> 00:24:18.037
six and a half hour drive each way just to come spend a few hours with me.

775
00:24:18.637 --> 00:24:19.158
Amazing.

776
00:24:19.798 --> 00:24:24.200
So I'm waiting for this car to come around the bend where I can see her.

777
00:24:24.880 --> 00:24:26.181
And I'm just sitting inside.

778
00:24:26.182 --> 00:24:26.541
I'm like,

779
00:24:27.061 --> 00:24:29.282
I'm where the visitors wait to go in.

780
00:24:30.122 --> 00:24:31.803
So I'm in this room.

781
00:24:32.995 --> 00:24:34.437
that has windows looking out,

782
00:24:35.057 --> 00:24:37.179
but I'm told that I can't go out.

783
00:24:37.379 --> 00:24:42.323
I got to wait for her to come get me because we're still on the property and there's acres around us.

784
00:24:42.823 --> 00:24:44.204
So it's a ways out to the road.

785
00:24:45.045 --> 00:24:48.928
So I'm waiting for her and I'm just looking and I'm kind of like trying to take it all in.

786
00:24:49.909 --> 00:24:52.211
And then I see the car coming and I'm like,

787
00:24:52.251 --> 00:24:52.551
okay,

788
00:24:53.412 --> 00:24:54.072
here she comes.

789
00:24:54.073 --> 00:24:55.353
And I'm like a little kid.

790
00:24:55.373 --> 00:24:56.114
I'm just giddy.

791
00:24:56.574 --> 00:24:56.975
And I'm like,

792
00:24:56.976 --> 00:24:57.115
oh.

793
00:24:57.642 --> 00:24:58.463
I got to get out the door.

794
00:25:00.464 --> 00:25:01.125
Little background.

795
00:25:01.665 --> 00:25:02.966
Couple weeks prior to this,

796
00:25:03.707 --> 00:25:04.248
another guy,

797
00:25:04.548 --> 00:25:05.328
same situation,

798
00:25:05.849 --> 00:25:06.529
similar case,

799
00:25:06.570 --> 00:25:07.110
had multiple

800
00:25:07.791 --> 00:25:09.352
924Cs, was granted relief,

801
00:25:10.173 --> 00:25:11.073
just like mine,

802
00:25:12.354 --> 00:25:13.155
gets to the door.

803
00:25:13.275 --> 00:25:14.536
His family's on the other side.

804
00:25:14.576 --> 00:25:17.499
They can see him and they come out and go,

805
00:25:17.519 --> 00:25:17.879
whoa,

806
00:25:19.120 --> 00:25:19.380
Sorry.

807
00:25:20.281 --> 00:25:22.603
They just filed an appeal.

808
00:25:22.903 --> 00:25:23.884
They got an injunction.

809
00:25:25.025 --> 00:25:25.806
You're going to have to stay.

810
00:25:27.030 --> 00:25:27.711
Wow.

811
00:25:28.692 --> 00:25:29.772
My wife knows this.

812
00:25:30.033 --> 00:25:31.814
My fiance at the time knows this.

813
00:25:32.355 --> 00:25:33.335
And so she's like,

814
00:25:34.016 --> 00:25:35.197
we just need to get out the door.

815
00:25:35.617 --> 00:25:36.558
We need to get out the door.

816
00:25:37.419 --> 00:25:41.963
So she pulls up and I come like jogging over with this cart.

817
00:25:42.243 --> 00:25:42.543
Right.

818
00:25:43.224 --> 00:25:47.447
And I push it off to the side and she comes and I just wrap my arms around her.

819
00:25:47.988 --> 00:25:48.949
Now you got to remember,

820
00:25:49.009 --> 00:25:52.091
like we've been together for 11 years at this point.

821
00:25:52.812 --> 00:25:53.693
She's seen me in a,

822
00:25:53.694 --> 00:25:55.254
in a maximum security where

823
00:25:56.358 --> 00:25:58.279
This is about how we were across the table.

824
00:25:58.879 --> 00:25:59.679
But there's noise.

825
00:25:59.699 --> 00:26:01.420
There's all sorts of other things going on.

826
00:26:01.440 --> 00:26:02.621
There's no contact.

827
00:26:03.161 --> 00:26:04.521
She was willing to put up with this,

828
00:26:04.841 --> 00:26:05.062
right?

829
00:26:05.722 --> 00:26:06.842
Hugging a kiss at the beginning,

830
00:26:07.062 --> 00:26:07.583
like brief.

831
00:26:08.043 --> 00:26:08.643
And at the end,

832
00:26:08.703 --> 00:26:09.123
that's it.

833
00:26:10.304 --> 00:26:12.445
Now we've been in a medium for a decade.

834
00:26:12.985 --> 00:26:16.026
And I'm able to hold her hand for a period.

835
00:26:16.906 --> 00:26:17.667
Policies change.

836
00:26:17.787 --> 00:26:18.967
She was able to sit next to me.

837
00:26:19.007 --> 00:26:20.008
I could hold her hand here,

838
00:26:20.048 --> 00:26:21.068
have my arm around her.

839
00:26:21.728 --> 00:26:25.250
I needed that physical contact to like,

840
00:26:25.350 --> 00:26:25.650
that was...

841
00:26:25.890 --> 00:26:30.973
a big part of my transition of like getting back to normalcy.

842
00:26:31.994 --> 00:26:37.718
So this is the first time where I get to put my arms around her and nobody can say,

843
00:26:37.818 --> 00:26:38.018
okay,

844
00:26:38.098 --> 00:26:38.499
break it up,

845
00:26:38.579 --> 00:26:38.999
break it up.

846
00:26:39.439 --> 00:26:40.800
Cause they do that all the time.

847
00:26:40.900 --> 00:26:41.741
That's enough Clawson.

848
00:26:41.781 --> 00:26:42.261
That's enough.

849
00:26:43.062 --> 00:26:45.303
And we're afraid that we're going to lose our visits that,

850
00:26:45.343 --> 00:26:45.583
you know,

851
00:26:46.044 --> 00:26:47.405
so they've been holding this over us.

852
00:26:48.105 --> 00:26:48.545
No more,

853
00:26:49.546 --> 00:26:49.986
no more.

854
00:26:50.026 --> 00:26:51.387
So I got my arms around her.

855
00:26:52.548 --> 00:26:53.108
Clawson,

856
00:26:54.189 --> 00:26:55.430
they need you back inside.

857
00:26:57.042 --> 00:26:58.703
She gripped me so hard.

858
00:27:00.203 --> 00:27:01.304
And then he starts laughing.

859
00:27:03.505 --> 00:27:04.445
Asshole.

860
00:27:04.446 --> 00:27:04.966
Asshole.

861
00:27:04.967 --> 00:27:05.526
Asshole.

862
00:27:05.626 --> 00:27:06.226
Asshole.

863
00:27:06.646 --> 00:27:08.947
And we look at him and I'm like,

864
00:27:09.127 --> 00:27:11.088
I realize I'm gripping onto her as well.

865
00:27:11.128 --> 00:27:11.448
I'm like,

866
00:27:11.749 --> 00:27:12.749
let's get the hell out of here.

867
00:27:13.149 --> 00:27:14.150
Let's just get in the car and go.

868
00:27:14.210 --> 00:27:17.291
And the story is amazing,

869
00:27:17.631 --> 00:27:18.031
by the way.

870
00:27:18.592 --> 00:27:21.913
The thing that shouldn't be overlooked for everyone that's going to be watching this,

871
00:27:22.813 --> 00:27:23.894
anybody who says...

872
00:27:24.430 --> 00:27:26.631
Having a vision board is for women only.

873
00:27:26.871 --> 00:27:28.092
You can go fuck yourselves.

874
00:27:29.593 --> 00:27:32.855
Because you did 20 years and walked out with your vision board.

875
00:27:32.995 --> 00:27:33.835
Good for you.

876
00:27:34.135 --> 00:27:35.176
I did.

877
00:27:35.516 --> 00:27:35.696
Like,

878
00:27:35.756 --> 00:27:36.617
that's just,

879
00:27:37.397 --> 00:27:38.438
holy shit.

880
00:27:39.118 --> 00:27:39.659
When you said that,

881
00:27:39.660 --> 00:27:39.919
I'm like,

882
00:27:39.959 --> 00:27:40.199
I know,

883
00:27:40.679 --> 00:27:42.160
girls have fucking parties for a vision board.

884
00:27:42.161 --> 00:27:42.400
She's like,

885
00:27:42.420 --> 00:27:43.060
I had a vision board.

886
00:27:43.761 --> 00:27:44.141
Fuck yeah,

887
00:27:44.181 --> 00:27:44.541
you did.

888
00:27:44.821 --> 00:27:45.362
Absolutely,

889
00:27:45.422 --> 00:27:45.622
man.

890
00:27:45.822 --> 00:27:47.503
Mad respect for you having a vision board.

891
00:27:47.543 --> 00:27:48.423
Because it's also,

892
00:27:49.224 --> 00:27:49.624
it's like,

893
00:27:49.704 --> 00:27:52.086
it gives you that glimmer of hope.

894
00:27:52.186 --> 00:27:52.766
That this is.

895
00:27:52.966 --> 00:27:57.069
this is what I want my life to be if and when I get out of here,

896
00:27:57.350 --> 00:27:57.570
right?

897
00:27:58.511 --> 00:27:59.792
A hundred percent.

898
00:27:59.872 --> 00:28:02.434
And the worse circumstance you are in,

899
00:28:02.594 --> 00:28:03.875
the more you need that.

900
00:28:04.555 --> 00:28:09.199
You need to be able to see something and believe that it's possible.

901
00:28:09.820 --> 00:28:12.462
So one of the other things that I had under my bunk,

902
00:28:12.562 --> 00:28:16.025
I was in the same cell for better part of a decade.

903
00:28:16.605 --> 00:28:16.725
And

904
00:28:17.866 --> 00:28:18.707
I'm on the bottom bunk,

905
00:28:18.807 --> 00:28:20.508
looking up at the top bunk above me.

906
00:28:21.289 --> 00:28:22.290
I had taken a black.

907
00:28:23.150 --> 00:28:25.612
indelible marker and wrote the word believe.

908
00:28:26.412 --> 00:28:30.395
So I had some photos and some other stuff up there and that vision board was always nearby.

909
00:28:31.456 --> 00:28:32.456
And it was a reminder.

910
00:28:32.556 --> 00:28:33.097
First thing,

911
00:28:33.717 --> 00:28:34.358
when I woke up,

912
00:28:34.438 --> 00:28:34.918
I saw it.

913
00:28:34.958 --> 00:28:36.499
And the last thing before I went to bed,

914
00:28:37.660 --> 00:28:41.863
always had to live in that faith that the opportunity was going to come.

915
00:28:42.783 --> 00:28:43.984
I had to keep doing my part.

916
00:28:43.985 --> 00:28:44.845
And every day I asked myself,

917
00:28:44.885 --> 00:28:47.727
have I done enough to earn that second chance?

918
00:28:47.867 --> 00:28:49.108
Everything that I possibly could.

919
00:28:50.489 --> 00:28:52.090
and that was a constant reminder.

920
00:28:52.530 --> 00:28:53.811
Vision boards are important,

921
00:28:53.851 --> 00:28:59.873
especially when you're in prison where everything is dull and gray and just bland.

922
00:28:59.973 --> 00:29:01.634
You have nothing to inspire you.

923
00:29:01.914 --> 00:29:02.734
Is there any,

924
00:29:03.115 --> 00:29:03.435
and not,

925
00:29:03.455 --> 00:29:03.755
I mean,

926
00:29:03.756 --> 00:29:04.615
I don't know if you've watched that,

927
00:29:04.616 --> 00:29:12.118
but any TV show or movie even comes close to capturing like what prison is like or are they all bullshit?

928
00:29:14.159 --> 00:29:15.120
So here's,

929
00:29:15.940 --> 00:29:19.902
it's hard to really answer that because.

930
00:29:20.486 --> 00:29:23.047
There's so many different versions of prison.

931
00:29:24.068 --> 00:29:26.429
Like some of the worst of what you've seen on TV,

932
00:29:26.649 --> 00:29:27.629
what's dramatized,

933
00:29:28.150 --> 00:29:31.071
is actually pretty close to the truth in some places.

934
00:29:33.212 --> 00:29:34.433
But for the most part,

935
00:29:34.513 --> 00:29:36.434
it's usually somewhere in between.

936
00:29:37.534 --> 00:29:40.336
And it's not all the time that...

937
00:29:41.362 --> 00:29:42.543
frenetic energy,

938
00:29:42.763 --> 00:29:43.724
that drama,

939
00:29:43.904 --> 00:29:44.464
high drama,

940
00:29:44.924 --> 00:29:46.626
it's usually spurts of that.

941
00:29:48.087 --> 00:29:48.927
It's peaceful,

942
00:29:49.127 --> 00:29:49.768
it's calm,

943
00:29:49.808 --> 00:29:52.270
it's just the average routine day to day.

944
00:29:52.850 --> 00:29:53.791
And that's what people want.

945
00:29:53.991 --> 00:30:02.116
People want their routine and then things get disrupted and it goes from zero to 100 very quick and then back down.

946
00:30:02.557 --> 00:30:03.177
Lockdown,

947
00:30:03.998 --> 00:30:05.118
get everything back in order.

948
00:30:06.379 --> 00:30:07.200
And it's hard.

949
00:30:07.300 --> 00:30:10.242
That makes it very hard to tell time except by those

950
00:30:11.238 --> 00:30:12.899
Peak instances,

951
00:30:12.999 --> 00:30:13.279
right?

952
00:30:14.920 --> 00:30:15.240
So yeah,

953
00:30:15.440 --> 00:30:15.821
I would say

954
00:30:16.481 --> 00:30:18.082
TV sometimes gets it right.

955
00:30:18.102 --> 00:30:18.822
I was like Oz.

956
00:30:19.483 --> 00:30:20.123
Oz was good,

957
00:30:20.183 --> 00:30:20.463
man.

958
00:30:20.663 --> 00:30:21.584
Oz was just gritty.

959
00:30:21.784 --> 00:30:22.624
And that's bad.

960
00:30:22.644 --> 00:30:23.265
You couldn't film.

961
00:30:23.325 --> 00:30:25.766
You can do Oz now the way the culture is now.

962
00:30:25.767 --> 00:30:26.626
But like Oz was just,

963
00:30:27.007 --> 00:30:27.227
again,

964
00:30:27.367 --> 00:30:27.967
I've never done time.

965
00:30:28.167 --> 00:30:28.588
But I'm like,

966
00:30:29.168 --> 00:30:29.368
okay,

967
00:30:29.808 --> 00:30:32.890
that watching that show alone was like,

968
00:30:32.970 --> 00:30:33.810
I never want it.

969
00:30:33.870 --> 00:30:35.711
I'll never commit a fucking felony or crime.

970
00:30:35.771 --> 00:30:36.592
Like I'm good.

971
00:30:36.872 --> 00:30:37.813
I like out of BC.

972
00:30:38.073 --> 00:30:40.054
Like I don't want to get raped by out of BC.

973
00:30:40.554 --> 00:30:41.175
in the shower.

974
00:30:41.375 --> 00:30:41.575
Like,

975
00:30:42.035 --> 00:30:42.155
no,

976
00:30:42.355 --> 00:30:43.296
I'm not that attractive,

977
00:30:43.297 --> 00:30:44.617
but he probably wouldn't throw me away.

978
00:30:44.697 --> 00:30:45.137
So it's like,

979
00:30:45.237 --> 00:30:45.558
okay.

980
00:30:46.959 --> 00:30:47.899
But it's just,

981
00:30:48.600 --> 00:30:49.581
there's so many,

982
00:30:50.541 --> 00:30:50.801
I think,

983
00:30:50.861 --> 00:30:51.702
misconceptions,

984
00:30:52.423 --> 00:30:52.663
right?

985
00:30:52.743 --> 00:30:54.344
And you touched on a lot of them.

986
00:30:54.904 --> 00:30:55.885
I love when you said,

987
00:30:56.105 --> 00:30:56.365
you know,

988
00:30:56.445 --> 00:30:59.868
when on your release day that there were lifers that were,

989
00:30:59.908 --> 00:31:00.168
you know,

990
00:31:00.208 --> 00:31:02.190
cheering you on as you're pushing your cart,

991
00:31:03.190 --> 00:31:03.410
you know,

992
00:31:03.550 --> 00:31:04.311
out of the prison.

993
00:31:04.511 --> 00:31:05.492
I love that because

994
00:31:06.072 --> 00:31:08.274
I think even for that brief moment.

995
00:31:08.474 --> 00:31:10.274
It was like you were part of their vision board.

996
00:31:12.035 --> 00:31:12.815
Without a doubt.

997
00:31:13.815 --> 00:31:14.976
And I'm going to jump ahead.

998
00:31:15.296 --> 00:31:15.536
Please.

999
00:31:15.537 --> 00:31:18.457
Because the greatest thing that I get to do now,

1000
00:31:18.517 --> 00:31:18.777
wow,

1001
00:31:18.897 --> 00:31:20.417
I feel emotional just talking about it,

1002
00:31:21.958 --> 00:31:23.718
is I get to advocate for those people.

1003
00:31:24.578 --> 00:31:26.899
The guy who initially carved out space for me,

1004
00:31:26.900 --> 00:31:28.420
a guy named Kevin McTaggart,

1005
00:31:29.400 --> 00:31:31.540
has been in 43 years.

1006
00:31:32.461 --> 00:31:36.902
I recently got to hand part of his petition.

1007
00:31:37.790 --> 00:31:38.410
to the U.S.

1008
00:31:38.490 --> 00:31:40.191
pardon attorney and say,

1009
00:31:40.271 --> 00:31:40.511
listen,

1010
00:31:40.591 --> 00:31:41.771
this is someone,

1011
00:31:42.031 --> 00:31:43.752
if you're going to really look at one,

1012
00:31:43.772 --> 00:31:44.892
you need to look at this guy.

1013
00:31:45.392 --> 00:31:46.713
He saved a woman's life.

1014
00:31:48.193 --> 00:31:49.373
She probably would have died.

1015
00:31:50.554 --> 00:31:51.994
He's done all these amazing things,

1016
00:31:52.954 --> 00:31:54.495
helped me transform my life,

1017
00:31:54.835 --> 00:31:55.795
kept me on track,

1018
00:31:56.375 --> 00:31:57.756
and has done that for so many others.

1019
00:31:58.136 --> 00:32:01.157
I get to advocate for him and countless others now.

1020
00:32:02.077 --> 00:32:03.578
And back in January,

1021
00:32:04.038 --> 00:32:05.058
I got the phone call.

1022
00:32:05.722 --> 00:32:06.742
And I'm looking at my phone,

1023
00:32:06.782 --> 00:32:07.002
right?

1024
00:32:07.102 --> 00:32:07.723
It comes up.

1025
00:32:08.123 --> 00:32:09.523
It says government something.

1026
00:32:09.524 --> 00:32:10.003
And I'm like,

1027
00:32:11.123 --> 00:32:12.444
do I really want to answer this?

1028
00:32:12.464 --> 00:32:13.484
Because it's like,

1029
00:32:14.224 --> 00:32:14.604
I don't know,

1030
00:32:14.744 --> 00:32:15.865
seven o'clock at night.

1031
00:32:16.445 --> 00:32:17.505
And I'm still at the computer.

1032
00:32:17.585 --> 00:32:18.806
I'm working on something.

1033
00:32:19.446 --> 00:32:20.806
And I've got calls in,

1034
00:32:21.406 --> 00:32:24.987
emails out to all these case managers because I'm collecting information.

1035
00:32:25.427 --> 00:32:29.128
We're putting together files for people that my partner and I are advocating for,

1036
00:32:29.669 --> 00:32:30.929
trying to get them clemency,

1037
00:32:31.229 --> 00:32:32.109
commutations,

1038
00:32:32.249 --> 00:32:32.949
early release,

1039
00:32:33.049 --> 00:32:33.309
right?

1040
00:32:34.070 --> 00:32:34.670
And a lot of them,

1041
00:32:34.890 --> 00:32:35.130
like...

1042
00:32:35.654 --> 00:32:36.274
They're lifers.

1043
00:32:36.334 --> 00:32:37.735
This is their only option.

1044
00:32:38.755 --> 00:32:41.177
And so I see it and it says government.

1045
00:32:41.178 --> 00:32:41.457
I'm like,

1046
00:32:43.077 --> 00:32:44.478
I really don't want to talk to anybody.

1047
00:32:44.838 --> 00:32:45.859
Let me just answer it.

1048
00:32:46.379 --> 00:32:47.259
I pick it up and I hear,

1049
00:32:47.700 --> 00:32:47.820
yo.

1050
00:32:47.821 --> 00:32:48.900
I'm like,

1051
00:32:50.061 --> 00:32:50.181
yo,

1052
00:32:50.481 --> 00:32:50.741
what?

1053
00:32:51.081 --> 00:32:51.681
Who is this,

1054
00:32:51.741 --> 00:32:51.981
man?

1055
00:32:52.702 --> 00:32:53.102
He says,

1056
00:32:53.142 --> 00:32:53.862
it's Benjamin.

1057
00:32:55.683 --> 00:32:55.943
I said,

1058
00:32:55.983 --> 00:32:56.343
Benjamin?

1059
00:32:56.644 --> 00:32:56.904
I said,

1060
00:32:57.004 --> 00:32:57.184
oh,

1061
00:32:57.824 --> 00:32:58.945
he's on a cell phone.

1062
00:32:59.545 --> 00:33:00.565
He's got it spoofed,

1063
00:33:00.665 --> 00:33:00.926
right?

1064
00:33:00.986 --> 00:33:01.606
Like it's got a...

1065
00:33:02.006 --> 00:33:04.607
He's just got it saying something government to hide the number.

1066
00:33:05.028 --> 00:33:05.968
That's what I'm thinking.

1067
00:33:06.048 --> 00:33:06.388
I'm like,

1068
00:33:06.729 --> 00:33:09.190
but this guy has never called me from a cell phone.

1069
00:33:09.670 --> 00:33:09.910
You know,

1070
00:33:10.371 --> 00:33:10.551
listen,

1071
00:33:10.611 --> 00:33:12.692
I get a lot of calls from,

1072
00:33:13.392 --> 00:33:13.632
you know,

1073
00:33:13.672 --> 00:33:15.053
people through the prison phones.

1074
00:33:15.173 --> 00:33:16.594
Like they come in all the time,

1075
00:33:16.974 --> 00:33:21.557
but I also occasionally get them from prison and I don't even know who's calling.

1076
00:33:21.558 --> 00:33:22.397
And it's just all of a sudden,

1077
00:33:22.398 --> 00:33:22.637
you know,

1078
00:33:22.638 --> 00:33:23.898
they're on somebody else's phone.

1079
00:33:24.598 --> 00:33:24.719
So

1080
00:33:25.579 --> 00:33:25.899
I'm like,

1081
00:33:26.119 --> 00:33:26.239
oh,

1082
00:33:26.279 --> 00:33:27.960
he's got this thing spoofed.

1083
00:33:27.980 --> 00:33:28.341
I'm like,

1084
00:33:28.801 --> 00:33:29.621
it's the first thought.

1085
00:33:30.182 --> 00:33:30.742
And then he goes,

1086
00:33:31.246 --> 00:33:31.466
Man,

1087
00:33:31.506 --> 00:33:34.929
I just got off the phone with Josh Smith,

1088
00:33:35.789 --> 00:33:38.531
who's the deputy director of the Federal Bureau of Prisons,

1089
00:33:39.071 --> 00:33:39.352
and Ms.

1090
00:33:39.432 --> 00:33:40.412
Alice Marie Johnson,

1091
00:33:41.073 --> 00:33:46.536
who is our pardon czar that President Trump appointed for pardons and commutations.

1092
00:33:47.297 --> 00:33:47.717
He said,

1093
00:33:48.137 --> 00:33:49.939
they just granted me immediate release.

1094
00:33:51.460 --> 00:33:52.921
And I lost it,

1095
00:33:52.941 --> 00:33:53.301
man.

1096
00:33:53.541 --> 00:33:56.303
I just started yelling like I got the news.

1097
00:33:56.663 --> 00:34:00.666
The way that I always imagined I would celebrate for myself.

1098
00:34:01.446 --> 00:34:02.607
I celebrated for him.

1099
00:34:02.807 --> 00:34:03.427
I'm yelling.

1100
00:34:03.607 --> 00:34:04.328
I'm screaming.

1101
00:34:04.648 --> 00:34:05.869
I don't know what the neighbors think.

1102
00:34:06.249 --> 00:34:06.749
My wife,

1103
00:34:06.829 --> 00:34:07.990
my son come running in.

1104
00:34:08.010 --> 00:34:08.290
They're like,

1105
00:34:08.291 --> 00:34:08.670
oh my God,

1106
00:34:08.671 --> 00:34:09.331
are you okay?

1107
00:34:09.591 --> 00:34:10.351
What's going on here?

1108
00:34:11.012 --> 00:34:11.592
And I'm like,

1109
00:34:11.593 --> 00:34:12.192
he got it.

1110
00:34:12.252 --> 00:34:12.973
He got it.

1111
00:34:13.713 --> 00:34:14.073
And

1112
00:34:14.654 --> 00:34:16.435
I just can't even contain myself.

1113
00:34:16.915 --> 00:34:17.916
And I start crying,

1114
00:34:18.056 --> 00:34:18.316
man.

1115
00:34:18.356 --> 00:34:18.816
And I'm like,

1116
00:34:18.936 --> 00:34:20.897
I'm just overwhelmed with emotion.

1117
00:34:20.917 --> 00:34:22.358
This is a guy who was serving a life sentence,

1118
00:34:22.378 --> 00:34:23.439
had 18 years in,

1119
00:34:23.899 --> 00:34:24.760
old crack law.

1120
00:34:25.040 --> 00:34:26.721
It should have been out.

1121
00:34:26.841 --> 00:34:27.801
Should have been out years ago.

1122
00:34:29.382 --> 00:34:30.003
But they did.

1123
00:34:30.023 --> 00:34:33.409
The president granted him an immediate release,

1124
00:34:33.910 --> 00:34:35.273
got rid of his supervision,

1125
00:34:35.393 --> 00:34:35.693
nothing.

1126
00:34:35.734 --> 00:34:37.877
He's walking out the door free.

1127
00:34:38.607 --> 00:34:39.087
And I'm like,

1128
00:34:39.427 --> 00:34:39.948
wow.

1129
00:34:40.828 --> 00:34:45.751
So it's cool to me to sit and listen to you tell these stories.

1130
00:34:45.752 --> 00:34:46.972
And we're like a half an hour in.

1131
00:34:47.512 --> 00:35:01.380
But you started this whole thing in chasing a negative thing in knocking off brothels to either get money or for drugs or for alcohol or just making bad choices.

1132
00:35:01.381 --> 00:35:02.481
You were the bad group of people.

1133
00:35:02.821 --> 00:35:05.583
But there was a high that you were chasing in doing that.

1134
00:35:06.303 --> 00:35:07.503
You've not had a complete

1135
00:35:07.924 --> 00:35:11.925
180 that now the high you get is not.

1136
00:35:12.705 --> 00:35:12.965
Yes,

1137
00:35:13.065 --> 00:35:14.145
you getting out is huge,

1138
00:35:14.205 --> 00:35:21.108
but I guarantee you the high you feel now is even greater than when you got out by stories like this.

1139
00:35:21.288 --> 00:35:31.811
When you get calls like that and working so hard to get people who from antiquated laws are still imprisoned and should be released.

1140
00:35:32.283 --> 00:35:32.863
immediately.

1141
00:35:33.304 --> 00:35:33.844
Am I right?

1142
00:35:33.845 --> 00:35:34.705
100%.

1143
00:35:34.745 --> 00:35:35.025
Right?

1144
00:35:35.145 --> 00:35:35.265
Yep.

1145
00:35:35.786 --> 00:35:39.488
That's like the coolest part of your story.

1146
00:35:39.888 --> 00:35:40.989
And that's why it took us

1147
00:35:41.550 --> 00:35:43.291
40 minutes plus to get there,

1148
00:35:43.571 --> 00:35:44.412
but we had to.

1149
00:35:44.872 --> 00:35:45.032
Yeah.

1150
00:35:47.053 --> 00:35:49.195
I wanted you to walk me through,

1151
00:35:50.015 --> 00:35:50.356
you know,

1152
00:35:51.436 --> 00:35:54.659
it was literally like the first 10 minutes of Saving Private Ryan,

1153
00:35:55.779 --> 00:35:56.100
you know,

1154
00:35:56.540 --> 00:35:59.142
and it was over on and off spiking,

1155
00:35:59.402 --> 00:35:59.642
you know,

1156
00:35:59.662 --> 00:36:00.663
for the first 10 years.

1157
00:36:00.863 --> 00:36:03.044
A little bit better for the second 10 years,

1158
00:36:03.064 --> 00:36:04.725
but then it's like you're out.

1159
00:36:05.846 --> 00:36:08.987
What was it after you got out that you thought,

1160
00:36:09.828 --> 00:36:16.892
I want to help people that were like me and help those that are incarcerated wrongfully,

1161
00:36:17.412 --> 00:36:20.053
either for the duration that they're in for or whatever,

1162
00:36:20.634 --> 00:36:21.774
to help them get out?

1163
00:36:23.575 --> 00:36:24.156
Believe it or not,

1164
00:36:24.176 --> 00:36:25.156
that was always the plan.

1165
00:36:26.257 --> 00:36:30.079
So what planted the seed was back in.

1166
00:36:30.667 --> 00:36:33.068
In 2001,

1167
00:36:33.088 --> 00:36:33.528
9-11,

1168
00:36:34.489 --> 00:36:35.669
I end up in the hole.

1169
00:36:35.989 --> 00:36:37.150
I'm in the hole on 9-11.

1170
00:36:37.790 --> 00:36:45.733
And there was a number of things that happened that were like instrumental in me really starting to look at myself and going,

1171
00:36:45.734 --> 00:36:45.914
man,

1172
00:36:46.014 --> 00:36:46.194
like,

1173
00:36:46.254 --> 00:36:46.694
come on,

1174
00:36:47.074 --> 00:36:47.814
you got to wake up.

1175
00:36:47.834 --> 00:36:49.355
You got to start making better decisions.

1176
00:36:49.755 --> 00:36:51.396
And it's not something that happens immediately.

1177
00:36:52.296 --> 00:36:54.917
But I read Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning.

1178
00:36:55.918 --> 00:36:56.638
And in there,

1179
00:36:56.838 --> 00:36:57.278
Frankl,

1180
00:36:57.539 --> 00:36:58.299
who was a doctor,

1181
00:36:58.887 --> 00:36:59.647
psychiatrist,

1182
00:36:59.707 --> 00:37:00.408
Nazi Germany,

1183
00:37:00.848 --> 00:37:05.130
finds himself in a concentration camp watching everybody around him die,

1184
00:37:05.250 --> 00:37:07.511
like literally give up the will to live.

1185
00:37:07.871 --> 00:37:08.231
And he said,

1186
00:37:08.232 --> 00:37:08.551
you know what?

1187
00:37:08.591 --> 00:37:09.451
That's not going to be me.

1188
00:37:10.112 --> 00:37:14.854
And he envisioned in his mind's eye himself years into the future,

1189
00:37:15.474 --> 00:37:17.795
standing in front of his students,

1190
00:37:18.335 --> 00:37:21.656
teaching them about letting them know what he was seeing,

1191
00:37:21.696 --> 00:37:22.637
what he was witnessing,

1192
00:37:22.897 --> 00:37:24.357
so that it would never be repeated.

1193
00:37:24.778 --> 00:37:26.478
That's how he found a sense of purpose.

1194
00:37:27.059 --> 00:37:27.439
For me...

1195
00:37:28.679 --> 00:37:30.620
I took part of that and I was like,

1196
00:37:31.120 --> 00:37:31.360
listen,

1197
00:37:31.640 --> 00:37:34.081
I'm someone who's been in here before,

1198
00:37:34.261 --> 00:37:35.682
ended up back in here again,

1199
00:37:35.762 --> 00:37:37.223
like didn't get what I needed.

1200
00:37:37.863 --> 00:37:43.405
I'm going to make sure that others don't go through everything that I had to go through to learn these lessons.

1201
00:37:43.525 --> 00:37:47.847
Let me simplify this and help them get to that conclusion more quickly.

1202
00:37:49.227 --> 00:37:50.548
So that was always my plan.

1203
00:37:50.908 --> 00:37:55.490
And my plan was when I get out to be able to go back into prison,

1204
00:37:56.190 --> 00:37:57.871
to be able to help others.

1205
00:37:58.271 --> 00:38:01.194
go through the transition successfully back into their communities,

1206
00:38:01.274 --> 00:38:02.114
into their families.

1207
00:38:02.775 --> 00:38:05.778
And part of what I did on the inside was develop a curriculum.

1208
00:38:06.859 --> 00:38:08.000
And ultimately,

1209
00:38:08.220 --> 00:38:09.821
that's what I did.

1210
00:38:09.921 --> 00:38:11.803
I spent five years working with Pepperdine,

1211
00:38:11.804 --> 00:38:12.323
Grazia Dio,

1212
00:38:12.444 --> 00:38:18.389
School of Business to get this curriculum validated as having a less than 3%

1213
00:38:18.529 --> 00:38:19.410
rate of recidivism,

1214
00:38:20.090 --> 00:38:21.992
which is extraordinary.

1215
00:38:22.973 --> 00:38:24.254
So that was all part of the plan.

1216
00:38:24.614 --> 00:38:25.375
And you

1217
00:38:25.667 --> 00:38:28.289
Getting together with other amazing people in this space,

1218
00:38:28.329 --> 00:38:29.049
like my partner,

1219
00:38:29.190 --> 00:38:30.110
Charles Duke Tanner,

1220
00:38:30.691 --> 00:38:31.771
former pro boxer,

1221
00:38:32.232 --> 00:38:32.672
lifer,

1222
00:38:33.292 --> 00:38:35.914
who got out during similar means.

1223
00:38:35.934 --> 00:38:46.061
He was granted a commutation by the president and has since been granted a full unconditional pardon for the amazing work that he's been doing since he got out about the same time I did.

1224
00:38:46.621 --> 00:38:49.203
We knew of each other and the work that we were doing inside.

1225
00:38:49.764 --> 00:38:52.085
Now we get to work together on the outside.

1226
00:38:52.606 --> 00:38:54.447
And we recently went back in.

1227
00:38:55.619 --> 00:38:56.279
to Coleman,

1228
00:38:56.600 --> 00:39:01.122
to the USPs down there in Florida with the deputy director,

1229
00:39:01.722 --> 00:39:02.362
Josh Smith,

1230
00:39:03.082 --> 00:39:08.164
and a group of other men who have done time and all did it as volunteers,

1231
00:39:08.625 --> 00:39:11.506
went back in there to be able to speak to the men,

1232
00:39:11.946 --> 00:39:13.247
to share our stories.

1233
00:39:13.687 --> 00:39:17.048
And there's something about being able to see,

1234
00:39:17.068 --> 00:39:21.170
like you could read about it in a book and we can send in newsletters and do all of those things.

1235
00:39:21.230 --> 00:39:23.631
But to see someone right there.

1236
00:39:23.671 --> 00:39:24.752
there in the room who says,

1237
00:39:24.812 --> 00:39:24.972
man,

1238
00:39:25.052 --> 00:39:25.852
I was sitting there.

1239
00:39:25.952 --> 00:39:27.313
I was in that chair,

1240
00:39:28.333 --> 00:39:29.194
seemingly hopeless.

1241
00:39:29.294 --> 00:39:29.754
Both of us,

1242
00:39:29.894 --> 00:39:30.634
my partner and I,

1243
00:39:30.694 --> 00:39:31.575
both lifers,

1244
00:39:32.275 --> 00:39:33.796
never supposed to get out,

1245
00:39:34.776 --> 00:39:35.637
but we did the work.

1246
00:39:35.638 --> 00:39:36.937
We continued to invest.

1247
00:39:37.058 --> 00:39:39.739
And when that opportunity arose...

1248
00:39:40.529 --> 00:39:42.450
we were able to walk out the door because we were ready.

1249
00:39:43.351 --> 00:39:44.711
So that was our message.

1250
00:39:44.791 --> 00:39:45.011
Like,

1251
00:39:45.052 --> 00:39:45.352
listen,

1252
00:39:45.452 --> 00:39:46.692
you have to stay ready.

1253
00:39:46.812 --> 00:39:48.453
You have to make these investments.

1254
00:39:48.774 --> 00:39:51.015
You have to believe in yourself and you have to believe that,

1255
00:39:51.075 --> 00:39:51.335
you know,

1256
00:39:52.135 --> 00:39:53.236
whatever your higher power is,

1257
00:39:53.336 --> 00:39:57.498
it's going to give you a little bit of help because it's not going to happen on your own.

1258
00:39:58.339 --> 00:40:01.281
And being able to do that now is like just,

1259
00:40:02.401 --> 00:40:02.661
wow,

1260
00:40:03.041 --> 00:40:03.462
amazing.

1261
00:40:03.642 --> 00:40:06.643
Is that the number one mission,

1262
00:40:07.224 --> 00:40:07.744
mantra?

1263
00:40:09.689 --> 00:40:25.156
thing also challenge you have is keeping people that are incarcerated that should be out motivated that there is hope so the culture covid covid had its had effects out here like everybody there

1264
00:40:25.176 --> 00:40:37.781
are certain things that we don't even realize especially with with youth who you know school they miss school during covid there there's gaps that are still just now starting to come to light.

1265
00:40:38.441 --> 00:40:44.065
The prison system universally across the country has not recovered because policies,

1266
00:40:44.145 --> 00:40:45.586
procedures changed.

1267
00:40:46.107 --> 00:40:47.668
Lockdowns became normal.

1268
00:40:48.148 --> 00:40:56.014
There are officers who have been working in these facilities who have never known what it's like to have a open complex,

1269
00:40:56.774 --> 00:40:58.876
meaning people can move around freely.

1270
00:40:59.556 --> 00:41:02.658
It's only been locked down for the whole time,

1271
00:41:02.678 --> 00:41:04.480
so they don't understand what that means.

1272
00:41:05.621 --> 00:41:06.061
So there's

1273
00:41:06.261 --> 00:41:07.082
A lot of changes,

1274
00:41:07.083 --> 00:41:08.162
a lot of repercussions,

1275
00:41:08.202 --> 00:41:08.362
yeah.

1276
00:41:09.723 --> 00:41:15.207
It's something that also the culture in prison,

1277
00:41:16.428 --> 00:41:18.830
different than the culture outside of prison,

1278
00:41:19.430 --> 00:41:24.714
like the fucking assholes walking around having open conversations on their cell phones on speakerphone.

1279
00:41:25.654 --> 00:41:26.034
Fuck you,

1280
00:41:26.154 --> 00:41:26.595
by the way.

1281
00:41:26.596 --> 00:41:27.175
If you do that,

1282
00:41:27.195 --> 00:41:27.976
go fuck yourself.

1283
00:41:28.036 --> 00:41:28.536
I don't care.

1284
00:41:28.576 --> 00:41:29.137
I hate that.

1285
00:41:29.138 --> 00:41:29.837
It drives me crazy.

1286
00:41:30.517 --> 00:41:30.718
Yeah.

1287
00:41:30.738 --> 00:41:31.498
That's my ADHD.

1288
00:41:32.199 --> 00:41:34.600
But are there still things that go on?

1289
00:41:35.101 --> 00:41:35.581
You're just kind of like.

1290
00:41:36.221 --> 00:41:41.125
It just kind of gets you a little bit that you see in terms of the,

1291
00:41:41.205 --> 00:41:41.585
let's say,

1292
00:41:41.685 --> 00:41:45.387
the free culture versus the incarcerated culture.

1293
00:41:46.288 --> 00:41:46.408
Oh,

1294
00:41:46.428 --> 00:41:46.929
100%.

1295
00:41:48.309 --> 00:42:02.559
There are certain levels of respect that exist in those environments because the rules of those environments dictate that you have to follow certain understood

1296
00:42:02.659 --> 00:42:03.400
procedures,

1297
00:42:03.920 --> 00:42:04.140
right?

1298
00:42:04.180 --> 00:42:05.321
Like you don't cut in line.

1299
00:42:06.473 --> 00:42:07.734
And if you're waiting to,

1300
00:42:08.034 --> 00:42:08.274
you know,

1301
00:42:08.275 --> 00:42:09.195
if you're on the phone,

1302
00:42:09.715 --> 00:42:12.557
you better respect the person next to you who's on the phone.

1303
00:42:13.138 --> 00:42:13.858
Don't get loud.

1304
00:42:13.958 --> 00:42:15.339
Don't interrupt their conversation.

1305
00:42:15.419 --> 00:42:22.904
Like there's just levels of respect that take place inside that do not exist out here.

1306
00:42:23.305 --> 00:42:25.026
And that can be very frustrating,

1307
00:42:25.446 --> 00:42:27.187
whether it's like interpersonal,

1308
00:42:27.688 --> 00:42:29.109
but there's also different,

1309
00:42:29.849 --> 00:42:30.570
like my partner,

1310
00:42:30.630 --> 00:42:33.612
Duke and I operate in business,

1311
00:42:34.112 --> 00:42:34.973
very different.

1312
00:42:35.561 --> 00:42:36.522
than most other people.

1313
00:42:36.722 --> 00:42:38.263
We've had some bad business partners,

1314
00:42:38.883 --> 00:42:42.005
but my wife says it all the time.

1315
00:42:42.045 --> 00:42:42.445
She's like,

1316
00:42:42.905 --> 00:42:48.068
the people you've done time with have a higher level of integrity as

1317
00:42:48.689 --> 00:42:51.530
99% of the other people that you have to deal with.

1318
00:42:52.111 --> 00:42:52.511
I'm like,

1319
00:42:52.631 --> 00:42:53.412
that's crazy,

1320
00:42:53.512 --> 00:42:53.692
right?

1321
00:42:53.872 --> 00:42:54.972
People would be shocked.

1322
00:42:57.134 --> 00:43:01.016
When we give our word to each other or to anybody else in business and life,

1323
00:43:01.116 --> 00:43:02.457
it means something

1324
00:43:03.189 --> 00:43:11.094
And that's part of where we come from and part of the credibility that we established and that we continue to maintain.

1325
00:43:11.194 --> 00:43:11.354
Like,

1326
00:43:11.374 --> 00:43:12.314
that means everything.

1327
00:43:12.354 --> 00:43:13.955
That means more to me than anything else.

1328
00:43:14.515 --> 00:43:15.376
It's like,

1329
00:43:17.077 --> 00:43:20.039
as a convicted felon who served 20 years in prison,

1330
00:43:20.379 --> 00:43:22.500
how do you deal with Vegas fucking road rage?

1331
00:43:22.960 --> 00:43:23.320
Oh,

1332
00:43:23.441 --> 00:43:23.821
God.

1333
00:43:24.281 --> 00:43:25.942
Vegas drivers are the worst,

1334
00:43:26.002 --> 00:43:26.302
man.

1335
00:43:26.602 --> 00:43:27.423
They are the worst.

1336
00:43:28.643 --> 00:43:28.824
Yeah.

1337
00:43:30.264 --> 00:43:31.085
Vegas is the worst.

1338
00:43:31.725 --> 00:43:34.606
And I drive everywhere all across the country because I travel a lot.

1339
00:43:35.246 --> 00:43:36.286
And believe it or not,

1340
00:43:36.726 --> 00:43:37.487
I'm happy.

1341
00:43:38.307 --> 00:43:40.648
People talk about East Coast drivers being kind of aggressive,

1342
00:43:40.668 --> 00:43:41.908
especially up in the Northeast.

1343
00:43:42.468 --> 00:43:42.968
I love it.

1344
00:43:43.648 --> 00:43:45.589
I love it.

1345
00:43:45.689 --> 00:43:46.589
I know you're going to go.

1346
00:43:47.870 --> 00:43:49.410
There's not going to be any hesitation.

1347
00:43:49.650 --> 00:43:50.510
And I respect that.

1348
00:43:50.970 --> 00:43:51.090
Go.

1349
00:43:51.571 --> 00:43:52.991
I was just my dad.

1350
00:43:53.311 --> 00:43:53.931
I'm from Canada.

1351
00:43:53.932 --> 00:43:54.431
I go to New York,

1352
00:43:54.971 --> 00:43:56.052
Western Finger Lakes region.

1353
00:43:56.692 --> 00:43:58.292
And I have clients in Rochester.

1354
00:43:58.572 --> 00:43:59.973
So I was back there last weekend.

1355
00:44:01.309 --> 00:44:02.069
It's just different.

1356
00:44:02.829 --> 00:44:03.009
Yeah.

1357
00:44:03.170 --> 00:44:03.450
It's just,

1358
00:44:03.510 --> 00:44:06.370
and even their road rage is like nothing.

1359
00:44:07.071 --> 00:44:09.531
Their road rage is like over here,

1360
00:44:10.051 --> 00:44:10.292
you know,

1361
00:44:10.672 --> 00:44:11.372
here it's like,

1362
00:44:11.373 --> 00:44:11.492
I mean,

1363
00:44:11.493 --> 00:44:12.472
I think it was on TikTok.

1364
00:44:12.473 --> 00:44:15.093
I think yesterday people like on the strip,

1365
00:44:15.193 --> 00:44:16.393
cars pulled over,

1366
00:44:17.013 --> 00:44:20.454
women beating the fucking tar out of each other.

1367
00:44:20.915 --> 00:44:21.415
Road rage.

1368
00:44:21.416 --> 00:44:21.735
I'm like,

1369
00:44:22.495 --> 00:44:22.875
really?

1370
00:44:23.735 --> 00:44:23.995
Is it?

1371
00:44:24.115 --> 00:44:24.355
I mean,

1372
00:44:24.395 --> 00:44:25.376
I've had people like I've,

1373
00:44:25.916 --> 00:44:26.136
yes,

1374
00:44:26.256 --> 00:44:26.956
I'm not perfect,

1375
00:44:26.957 --> 00:44:28.677
but like I've pulled in front of somebody out in

1376
00:44:29.017 --> 00:44:29.557
Inspirata.

1377
00:44:29.877 --> 00:44:31.938
And they've come around me and brake checked me.

1378
00:44:31.978 --> 00:44:32.318
And I'm like,

1379
00:44:32.678 --> 00:44:34.079
my 10-year-old son's in the car.

1380
00:44:34.139 --> 00:44:34.279
Oh,

1381
00:44:34.299 --> 00:44:34.559
man,

1382
00:44:34.659 --> 00:44:34.799
yeah.

1383
00:44:34.899 --> 00:44:35.439
And I'm like,

1384
00:44:35.739 --> 00:44:36.380
at first I'm like,

1385
00:44:36.460 --> 00:44:36.1000
motherfucker.

1386
00:44:37.160 --> 00:44:37.580
But then I'm like,

1387
00:44:37.680 --> 00:44:37.960
nope,

1388
00:44:38.180 --> 00:44:42.202
I'm setting an example as a dad to my son on how to handle something like this.

1389
00:44:42.322 --> 00:44:42.742
And I'm like,

1390
00:44:43.203 --> 00:44:43.803
what a jerk.

1391
00:44:43.923 --> 00:44:45.403
And it happened a couple weeks ago.

1392
00:44:45.544 --> 00:44:46.624
And my son Jack goes,

1393
00:44:47.124 --> 00:44:47.524
it's okay,

1394
00:44:47.584 --> 00:44:47.764
Dad.

1395
00:44:47.804 --> 00:44:48.825
Sometimes people suck.

1396
00:44:49.652 --> 00:44:50.192
I love that.

1397
00:44:50.292 --> 00:44:50.793
And I was like,

1398
00:44:50.853 --> 00:44:51.073
honey,

1399
00:44:51.433 --> 00:44:51.593
God,

1400
00:44:51.793 --> 00:44:52.894
from your lips to God's ears.

1401
00:44:53.395 --> 00:44:53.795
Thank you.

1402
00:44:54.535 --> 00:44:57.217
So let's talk about you as a dad.

1403
00:44:58.418 --> 00:44:58.618
Yeah.

1404
00:44:59.098 --> 00:44:59.359
All right.

1405
00:44:59.360 --> 00:45:01.400
Which I think is probably like one of your favorite subjects.

1406
00:45:01.640 --> 00:45:01.960
It is.

1407
00:45:02.101 --> 00:45:02.281
Ever,

1408
00:45:02.541 --> 00:45:02.821
right?

1409
00:45:02.921 --> 00:45:03.121
Yeah.

1410
00:45:03.862 --> 00:45:06.423
Talk to me about when you first became a dad.

1411
00:45:06.964 --> 00:45:10.266
Talk to me about life lessons now about like,

1412
00:45:10.867 --> 00:45:11.987
you're a very patient guy,

1413
00:45:12.628 --> 00:45:16.851
but you're a guy I think also that back when you were younger would go at the drop of a hat.

1414
00:45:17.051 --> 00:45:17.311
You'd go.

1415
00:45:17.931 --> 00:45:18.732
I have friends like you.

1416
00:45:18.932 --> 00:45:22.095
I went to college with guys like you that would just knock somebody out in a second.

1417
00:45:22.096 --> 00:45:22.835
If you looked at him funny,

1418
00:45:23.356 --> 00:45:23.616
I'm not,

1419
00:45:23.656 --> 00:45:24.617
I'm not stereotyping.

1420
00:45:24.618 --> 00:45:25.057
If I'm wrong,

1421
00:45:25.117 --> 00:45:25.778
please tell me

1422
00:45:26.218 --> 00:45:27.119
I respect to you.

1423
00:45:27.740 --> 00:45:29.261
But if you know,

1424
00:45:29.262 --> 00:45:29.501
if you,

1425
00:45:29.781 --> 00:45:30.042
if the,

1426
00:45:30.542 --> 00:45:30.842
if the,

1427
00:45:31.323 --> 00:45:31.563
you know,

1428
00:45:32.104 --> 00:45:35.567
16 year old Adam looked at the 2026

1429
00:45:36.247 --> 00:45:37.268
Adam and went,

1430
00:45:38.729 --> 00:45:38.970
Right.

1431
00:45:39.390 --> 00:45:39.610
Yeah.

1432
00:45:40.090 --> 00:45:45.235
So talk to me about fatherhood and when you first became a dad and all of that.

1433
00:45:45.896 --> 00:45:46.056
Yeah,

1434
00:45:46.057 --> 00:45:46.276
there's.

1435
00:45:46.436 --> 00:45:49.398
There's like no recognition from that young me.

1436
00:45:49.899 --> 00:45:51.120
But you're absolutely right.

1437
00:45:51.220 --> 00:45:53.662
And there was just like a switch.

1438
00:45:54.542 --> 00:45:55.583
Prison mellowed me.

1439
00:45:56.524 --> 00:45:57.484
And it was forced.

1440
00:45:57.845 --> 00:45:59.446
Like I had to learn discipline,

1441
00:45:59.486 --> 00:46:00.287
all of those things.

1442
00:46:01.087 --> 00:46:03.569
And to be perfectly honest,

1443
00:46:03.669 --> 00:46:05.971
thank God I didn't have a child when I was younger.

1444
00:46:06.651 --> 00:46:07.472
I wasn't equipped.

1445
00:46:07.912 --> 00:46:09.053
I wasn't equipped mentally.

1446
00:46:09.193 --> 00:46:11.695
I wasn't like just on every level.

1447
00:46:14.200 --> 00:46:16.042
But my wife and I very much planned our family.

1448
00:46:16.642 --> 00:46:17.062
And listen,

1449
00:46:17.202 --> 00:46:18.443
didn't waste any time either.

1450
00:46:18.544 --> 00:46:21.526
Like my son was born nine months after I was released,

1451
00:46:21.606 --> 00:46:21.846
right?

1452
00:46:22.186 --> 00:46:24.168
God bless you.

1453
00:46:24.169 --> 00:46:24.408
So great.

1454
00:46:24.528 --> 00:46:25.349
The crazy thing is,

1455
00:46:26.110 --> 00:46:27.591
like the first week I'm out,

1456
00:46:27.611 --> 00:46:28.972
there's people that we have,

1457
00:46:29.012 --> 00:46:29.232
you know,

1458
00:46:29.252 --> 00:46:30.974
who've been following us on YouTube were like,

1459
00:46:31.574 --> 00:46:32.335
are you pregnant yet?

1460
00:46:32.495 --> 00:46:32.915
And we're like,

1461
00:46:33.516 --> 00:46:34.657
like no pressure here,

1462
00:46:34.757 --> 00:46:35.097
right?

1463
00:46:37.559 --> 00:46:37.959
But yeah,

1464
00:46:38.660 --> 00:46:39.941
fortunately it happened quick.

1465
00:46:41.202 --> 00:46:41.342
And,

1466
00:46:41.482 --> 00:46:41.722
you know,

1467
00:46:41.723 --> 00:46:42.663
we had waited a long time,

1468
00:46:42.683 --> 00:46:43.724
but we're in our forties.

1469
00:46:44.164 --> 00:46:44.804
at this time,

1470
00:46:44.864 --> 00:46:45.065
which

1471
00:46:46.145 --> 00:46:47.046
I thought was cool,

1472
00:46:47.266 --> 00:46:48.426
except my wife,

1473
00:46:48.466 --> 00:46:51.448
it's like a geriatric pregnancy.

1474
00:46:51.788 --> 00:46:53.129
It's higher risk.

1475
00:46:53.289 --> 00:46:53.809
Higher risk,

1476
00:46:53.870 --> 00:46:54.330
but yeah,

1477
00:46:54.670 --> 00:46:58.852
they need to name that something else because that's going to make women feel very insecure,

1478
00:46:59.233 --> 00:46:59.513
right?

1479
00:46:59.973 --> 00:47:01.074
So fortunately,

1480
00:47:01.434 --> 00:47:03.255
we continue to work out every single day,

1481
00:47:03.595 --> 00:47:05.996
continue to do the things like health and wellness is huge.

1482
00:47:06.377 --> 00:47:06.837
And we're like,

1483
00:47:07.257 --> 00:47:08.458
we're going to have a healthy family,

1484
00:47:08.898 --> 00:47:09.698
set that standard.

1485
00:47:10.219 --> 00:47:12.140
And when my son was born,

1486
00:47:13.192 --> 00:47:13.953
From day one,

1487
00:47:14.033 --> 00:47:14.993
at first I was like,

1488
00:47:15.073 --> 00:47:15.654
oh my God,

1489
00:47:16.194 --> 00:47:17.555
I don't know what to do.

1490
00:47:18.296 --> 00:47:19.296
And my wife,

1491
00:47:20.137 --> 00:47:24.440
although she's grown up in a family with siblings,

1492
00:47:25.140 --> 00:47:25.661
she was like,

1493
00:47:26.641 --> 00:47:28.583
I'm a little out of sorts here too.

1494
00:47:28.763 --> 00:47:30.264
And we didn't have any family here.

1495
00:47:30.864 --> 00:47:32.766
It's literally just the two of us.

1496
00:47:33.306 --> 00:47:35.127
So we're kind of navigating this on our own,

1497
00:47:35.627 --> 00:47:36.868
kind of figuring it out as we go.

1498
00:47:37.889 --> 00:47:40.711
And fortunately it worked out.

1499
00:47:41.832 --> 00:47:42.112
But it's...

1500
00:47:42.292 --> 00:47:44.214
been like such a joy,

1501
00:47:44.574 --> 00:47:47.236
although there was some concerns like early on.

1502
00:47:47.237 --> 00:47:47.576
I'm like,

1503
00:47:47.957 --> 00:47:48.097
man,

1504
00:47:48.137 --> 00:47:49.818
I just don't know how to do this.

1505
00:47:51.520 --> 00:47:54.062
But we've been very fortunate because of COVID,

1506
00:47:54.943 --> 00:47:57.084
both of us working from home for the most part.

1507
00:47:57.865 --> 00:47:58.726
Although I travel,

1508
00:47:59.006 --> 00:48:01.568
I spend the majority of time like it's,

1509
00:48:02.189 --> 00:48:02.449
you know,

1510
00:48:03.690 --> 00:48:05.611
I make it a point to be at home,

1511
00:48:05.631 --> 00:48:06.392
to be present.

1512
00:48:06.912 --> 00:48:09.134
And I am so lucky to get to do that.

1513
00:48:09.194 --> 00:48:11.096
I know a lot of Families Don't.

1514
00:48:11.440 --> 00:48:12.240
They're not afforded that.

1515
00:48:13.701 --> 00:48:16.383
And a lot of fathers specifically don't get to do that.

1516
00:48:16.863 --> 00:48:19.064
So we get to really parent both of us.

1517
00:48:19.164 --> 00:48:22.526
And it's interesting because it's like in real time,

1518
00:48:22.947 --> 00:48:25.528
my wife wants to say yes.

1519
00:48:26.168 --> 00:48:28.069
And then she'll look to me like she wants me to say,

1520
00:48:28.770 --> 00:48:29.670
you'd be the one to say no.

1521
00:48:29.830 --> 00:48:35.253
And it's cool that we get to have these roles and to be so active in his life.

1522
00:48:35.854 --> 00:48:35.994
And

1523
00:48:37.014 --> 00:48:38.275
I was just saying earlier,

1524
00:48:38.435 --> 00:48:39.516
as we were leaving the gym,

1525
00:48:40.072 --> 00:48:40.452
I was like,

1526
00:48:40.453 --> 00:48:41.252
you know what I love?

1527
00:48:41.652 --> 00:48:43.873
I love how our son checks us.

1528
00:48:44.473 --> 00:48:44.693
You know,

1529
00:48:44.694 --> 00:48:44.993
he's four.

1530
00:48:45.013 --> 00:48:46.534
He's about to be five in July.

1531
00:48:47.054 --> 00:48:47.594
And he'd be like,

1532
00:48:48.114 --> 00:48:48.434
daddy,

1533
00:48:49.015 --> 00:48:50.195
no texting on the road.

1534
00:48:50.775 --> 00:48:51.035
Dad,

1535
00:48:51.215 --> 00:48:52.076
eyes on the road.

1536
00:48:52.296 --> 00:48:52.536
I mean,

1537
00:48:52.756 --> 00:48:53.516
he's four.

1538
00:48:53.536 --> 00:48:53.916
It's great.

1539
00:48:53.976 --> 00:48:54.336
He's like,

1540
00:48:54.436 --> 00:48:54.956
language,

1541
00:48:55.417 --> 00:48:55.877
language.

1542
00:48:55.977 --> 00:48:56.377
And I'm like,

1543
00:48:56.517 --> 00:48:57.937
you're absolutely right.

1544
00:48:57.957 --> 00:48:58.797
I was like,

1545
00:48:58.898 --> 00:49:00.038
how did we get so lucky?

1546
00:49:00.278 --> 00:49:01.898
He is so observant.

1547
00:49:02.519 --> 00:49:06.900
And he is just a constant reminder of all that is good in our lives.

1548
00:49:07.744 --> 00:49:09.506
It's something that I've said this often,

1549
00:49:09.526 --> 00:49:11.207
that when you're a dad,

1550
00:49:11.908 --> 00:49:12.508
when you're a parent,

1551
00:49:12.668 --> 00:49:15.110
you have a front row seat to the greatest show in the world,

1552
00:49:15.350 --> 00:49:18.393
and that is the maturation of a human being that you created.

1553
00:49:19.894 --> 00:49:23.998
And it is your inalienable right to love,

1554
00:49:24.818 --> 00:49:25.039
honor,

1555
00:49:25.059 --> 00:49:28.061
and protect that child with everything that you have.

1556
00:49:28.862 --> 00:49:36.168
And your son will benefit greatly from your past experiences.

1557
00:49:36.868 --> 00:49:40.635
Because there's things that you can draw upon that nobody else can.

1558
00:49:42.519 --> 00:49:45.405
And that is something that you need to give yourself,

1559
00:49:45.785 --> 00:49:46.427
if you haven't,

1560
00:49:47.148 --> 00:49:49.052
a tremendous amount of grace.

1561
00:49:49.862 --> 00:49:50.262
for that,

1562
00:49:51.142 --> 00:49:54.223
that you were put in that situation for that period of time for this reason.

1563
00:49:54.703 --> 00:49:59.365
But now your job is to be the best husband and father that you can.

1564
00:49:59.505 --> 00:50:00.285
And in that order,

1565
00:50:00.805 --> 00:50:07.387
because it all begins with your wife and that because you're setting the tone for what your son is going to see is a normal,

1566
00:50:07.527 --> 00:50:07.867
healthy,

1567
00:50:08.067 --> 00:50:08.987
loving relationship.

1568
00:50:09.767 --> 00:50:12.088
Whether you have a fight that you make up,

1569
00:50:12.348 --> 00:50:13.428
like it happens,

1570
00:50:13.429 --> 00:50:14.549
you have disagreements with stuff.

1571
00:50:14.869 --> 00:50:15.209
And so

1572
00:50:16.109 --> 00:50:19.290
I think that the only person and more blessed in you as your son.

1573
00:50:23.057 --> 00:50:23.257
Um,

1574
00:50:23.637 --> 00:50:23.797
it's,

1575
00:50:24.017 --> 00:50:25.038
it's an incredible,

1576
00:50:25.118 --> 00:50:31.884
incredible thing that you've come through something that most people would be like,

1577
00:50:31.944 --> 00:50:32.885
go right back in again.

1578
00:50:33.365 --> 00:50:33.645
Like what,

1579
00:50:33.925 --> 00:50:35.587
what's the rate of people that,

1580
00:50:36.467 --> 00:50:36.728
you know,

1581
00:50:36.808 --> 00:50:37.628
that serve,

1582
00:50:37.829 --> 00:50:38.029
you know,

1583
00:50:38.030 --> 00:50:39.510
that federal time.

1584
00:50:40.991 --> 00:50:41.551
What's the,

1585
00:50:41.552 --> 00:50:43.653
do you know the data at all about like what,

1586
00:50:44.254 --> 00:50:44.854
what's the,

1587
00:50:44.874 --> 00:50:49.438
the odds on them going back in within like a year or two years after they get released?

1588
00:50:50.030 --> 00:50:50.950
Has to be pretty high.

1589
00:50:51.070 --> 00:50:51.431
It is.

1590
00:50:52.071 --> 00:50:56.493
There's a very high number of people who get caught in that cycle of recidivism,

1591
00:50:56.953 --> 00:50:57.893
cycle in and out,

1592
00:50:58.313 --> 00:50:59.574
sometimes for a violation,

1593
00:50:59.774 --> 00:51:01.535
sometimes it's new charges.

1594
00:51:02.195 --> 00:51:02.935
Whatever it is,

1595
00:51:03.976 --> 00:51:07.957
the biggest thing is really just being able,

1596
00:51:08.057 --> 00:51:10.118
people don't understand the real challenges.

1597
00:51:11.399 --> 00:51:12.119
Psychological,

1598
00:51:12.879 --> 00:51:13.500
emotional,

1599
00:51:14.400 --> 00:51:18.742
coming into a family where especially if it's a family who's been.

1600
00:51:19.378 --> 00:51:19.598
you know,

1601
00:51:19.618 --> 00:51:21.319
existing without you in the home.

1602
00:51:22.019 --> 00:51:22.479
Now you're like,

1603
00:51:22.559 --> 00:51:23.019
I'm home.

1604
00:51:23.360 --> 00:51:24.200
Things are different.

1605
00:51:24.700 --> 00:51:25.861
I can create some friction.

1606
00:51:26.021 --> 00:51:27.821
And if you don't have great communication,

1607
00:51:28.842 --> 00:51:29.122
you know,

1608
00:51:29.182 --> 00:51:30.843
you're going to run into more and more challenges.

1609
00:51:31.183 --> 00:51:31.803
I can say this,

1610
00:51:31.863 --> 00:51:32.103
that,

1611
00:51:32.703 --> 00:51:32.964
you know,

1612
00:51:33.344 --> 00:51:34.204
with my wife and I,

1613
00:51:34.684 --> 00:51:35.825
both being coaches,

1614
00:51:36.745 --> 00:51:37.185
huge,

1615
00:51:37.325 --> 00:51:41.547
huge impact that has had on our relationship to help us communicate,

1616
00:51:42.107 --> 00:51:45.769
to have to do it while we were physically separate.

1617
00:51:46.149 --> 00:51:46.969
I'm going to say for me,

1618
00:51:47.049 --> 00:51:48.430
it's been a huge advantage.

1619
00:51:49.030 --> 00:51:52.372
Because the physical part of that relationship didn't get in the way.

1620
00:51:53.373 --> 00:51:53.913
And it didn't,

1621
00:51:54.393 --> 00:52:00.156
I think a lot of people that clouds their judgment and just was very fortunate in that regard.

1622
00:52:00.497 --> 00:52:02.618
And now having my son,

1623
00:52:02.718 --> 00:52:05.119
we are always conscious of how we are modeling that.

1624
00:52:05.259 --> 00:52:06.240
Just as you said,

1625
00:52:08.641 --> 00:52:09.982
it's not the incentive,

1626
00:52:10.322 --> 00:52:12.103
but it's a large part of it.

1627
00:52:12.123 --> 00:52:13.884
We want him to see what that looks like.

1628
00:52:15.965 --> 00:52:17.366
I know that the statistics.

1629
00:52:18.026 --> 00:52:23.229
are that the majority of men who are in prison come from single parent households.

1630
00:52:23.909 --> 00:52:24.890
And it's generally,

1631
00:52:25.830 --> 00:52:28.252
those are households where the father is not present.

1632
00:52:28.892 --> 00:52:29.632
I know that.

1633
00:52:29.833 --> 00:52:33.715
I know how significant it is to have a father in the home.

1634
00:52:33.995 --> 00:52:36.596
I know that for me,

1635
00:52:36.636 --> 00:52:38.697
it was something that I've stated many times.

1636
00:52:39.037 --> 00:52:40.999
I wish I would have had a strong male role model.

1637
00:52:41.359 --> 00:52:44.480
There were times where I needed someone to be firm with me.

1638
00:52:45.281 --> 00:52:47.102
And that was a role that my mother just couldn't play.

1639
00:52:47.470 --> 00:52:47.650
Right.

1640
00:52:48.231 --> 00:52:48.351
So

1641
00:52:48.771 --> 00:52:50.352
I will always be there for my son.

1642
00:52:50.913 --> 00:52:53.415
That is my priority to be a husband first,

1643
00:52:53.935 --> 00:52:55.457
and then a father second to him.

1644
00:52:55.497 --> 00:52:55.617
And,

1645
00:52:56.037 --> 00:52:57.218
and so that he knows,

1646
00:52:57.999 --> 00:52:58.279
you know,

1647
00:52:58.439 --> 00:52:58.719
where the,

1648
00:52:58.779 --> 00:52:59.900
where those boundaries are.

1649
00:53:00.441 --> 00:53:01.422
And he knows that,

1650
00:53:01.622 --> 00:53:01.922
listen,

1651
00:53:02.002 --> 00:53:03.363
like you can still be firm and,

1652
00:53:03.503 --> 00:53:03.663
and,

1653
00:53:04.004 --> 00:53:04.244
you know,

1654
00:53:04.504 --> 00:53:05.785
come from a loving home and,

1655
00:53:07.006 --> 00:53:09.188
there is no doubt he knows that he is loved.

1656
00:53:09.508 --> 00:53:09.849
And,

1657
00:53:11.170 --> 00:53:11.310
yeah.

1658
00:53:12.614 --> 00:53:15.355
So it's something that if you were to ask either of my kids to say,

1659
00:53:15.775 --> 00:53:16.575
what's your dad's job?

1660
00:53:16.615 --> 00:53:17.255
And they would both say,

1661
00:53:17.256 --> 00:53:18.136
it's to love and protect me.

1662
00:53:19.176 --> 00:53:19.716
They know that.

1663
00:53:19.756 --> 00:53:20.977
They also know I'll never lie to them.

1664
00:53:21.697 --> 00:53:23.637
And I've made some horrific mistakes in my life.

1665
00:53:23.638 --> 00:53:23.997
And I said,

1666
00:53:23.998 --> 00:53:24.618
when you're old enough,

1667
00:53:24.738 --> 00:53:25.878
you want to ask me that question?

1668
00:53:26.278 --> 00:53:27.398
Be prepared for the answer.

1669
00:53:27.798 --> 00:53:29.439
We'll have a therapist on speed dial for you.

1670
00:53:29.919 --> 00:53:30.239
But

1671
00:53:30.619 --> 00:53:31.400
I would much rather

1672
00:53:32.380 --> 00:53:38.141
I never want you to think I'm telling you something that is shady or in a gray area or an outright lie.

1673
00:53:38.362 --> 00:53:38.982
Even a white lie.

1674
00:53:39.142 --> 00:53:39.822
I just don't do it.

1675
00:53:40.238 --> 00:53:41.278
I don't do it with my kids,

1676
00:53:41.358 --> 00:53:41.899
with my wife.

1677
00:53:41.999 --> 00:53:42.839
I just don't.

1678
00:53:42.919 --> 00:53:43.279
It's just,

1679
00:53:43.319 --> 00:53:46.801
it is a wonderful freeing thing.

1680
00:53:46.921 --> 00:53:48.201
Talk about living in a flow state.

1681
00:53:48.942 --> 00:53:50.562
To be in a relationship with someone that,

1682
00:53:50.622 --> 00:53:50.842
you know,

1683
00:53:51.022 --> 00:53:51.463
loves you,

1684
00:53:52.323 --> 00:53:52.583
you know,

1685
00:53:53.043 --> 00:53:53.784
unconditionally,

1686
00:53:54.004 --> 00:54:02.307
obviously would go through a wall of fire for you and that you have this like ultra Jedi level,

1687
00:54:02.707 --> 00:54:02.947
you know,

1688
00:54:02.967 --> 00:54:04.588
of trust for each other.

1689
00:54:04.988 --> 00:54:05.829
And nobody's perfect,

1690
00:54:05.830 --> 00:54:06.229
but it's like,

1691
00:54:06.429 --> 00:54:07.009
that's the thing.

1692
00:54:07.309 --> 00:54:07.909
I always say

1693
00:54:08.590 --> 00:54:09.370
I'm an imperfect.

1694
00:54:09.450 --> 00:54:22.934
person but I love perfectly and I try to do better every single day that's all we can do you know that's all we can do is and I think also you get older I'm 56 I'm like I have nothing to prove anymore my ego's gone fuck that

1695
00:54:23.654 --> 00:54:38.118
I love my wife I love my kids I love what I do for a living I love doing this and having people in like this has been fantastic by the way like it's just been this is probably episode 115 or 120 and it's just like there's something that always will stick with me.

1696
00:54:38.298 --> 00:54:39.078
This will always stick.

1697
00:54:39.158 --> 00:54:39.439
with me,

1698
00:54:39.679 --> 00:54:40.520
this conversation.

1699
00:54:41.562 --> 00:54:43.385
Let's talk a little bit in closing about,

1700
00:54:44.828 --> 00:54:45.108
you know,

1701
00:54:45.910 --> 00:54:46.030
the,

1702
00:54:46.070 --> 00:54:46.591
company that you,

1703
00:54:46.671 --> 00:54:46.992
that you're,

1704
00:54:47.092 --> 00:54:50.157
that you're doing and how people can get ahold of you.

1705
00:54:50.975 --> 00:54:52.034
but also the mission.

1706
00:54:52.936 --> 00:54:54.356
I really want to let,

1707
00:54:54.416 --> 00:54:55.636
so people know that,

1708
00:54:55.637 --> 00:54:55.956
and this will,

1709
00:54:55.976 --> 00:54:56.917
I'll clip up all this,

1710
00:54:57.337 --> 00:54:57.577
you know,

1711
00:54:57.816 --> 00:54:58.716
obviously as well,

1712
00:54:58.816 --> 00:55:00.677
but what is it that you do?

1713
00:55:01.217 --> 00:55:04.298
Who is the perfect person that should be reaching out to you?

1714
00:55:05.039 --> 00:55:05.198
Like,

1715
00:55:05.239 --> 00:55:05.939
is it like,

1716
00:55:05.958 --> 00:55:08.300
say it's the spouse of somebody who's incarcerated or,

1717
00:55:08.360 --> 00:55:08.600
you know,

1718
00:55:08.659 --> 00:55:09.579
or something like that.

1719
00:55:10.760 --> 00:55:10.959
Wow.

1720
00:55:11.300 --> 00:55:13.561
So a couple of different things.

1721
00:55:13.561 --> 00:55:14.981
So we have three companies right now.

1722
00:55:15.302 --> 00:55:16.582
One is Legacy Impact Group,

1723
00:55:16.922 --> 00:55:18.841
which is a consulting company where we do,

1724
00:55:18.943 --> 00:55:20.383
We work with a lot of families.

1725
00:55:20.802 --> 00:55:23.064
Our goal is to help get people relief,

1726
00:55:23.644 --> 00:55:25.404
get them home either through clemency,

1727
00:55:25.704 --> 00:55:27.925
which can be a commutation generally.

1728
00:55:28.685 --> 00:55:31.066
We also focus on compassionate release,

1729
00:55:31.186 --> 00:55:34.247
but early release through good time credits,

1730
00:55:34.606 --> 00:55:36.267
through different things that can be earned.

1731
00:55:36.269 --> 00:55:39.427
And we encourage people or guide them how to get down that path.

1732
00:55:40.008 --> 00:55:42.048
Second thing that we have is a technology company.

1733
00:55:42.829 --> 00:55:43.070
You know,

1734
00:55:43.169 --> 00:55:44.350
AI is pretty much,

1735
00:55:45.110 --> 00:55:45.369
you know,

1736
00:55:45.869 --> 00:55:47.831
an integral part of everything.

1737
00:55:48.458 --> 00:55:48.939
Right now,

1738
00:55:49.019 --> 00:55:50.721
it's taking over all different industries,

1739
00:55:50.780 --> 00:55:52.142
figuring out how to incorporate it.

1740
00:55:52.662 --> 00:55:56.284
So that core curriculum that I told you about that was validated by Pepperdine,

1741
00:55:56.664 --> 00:56:07.392
we have a technology company that has taken that core curriculum and added an AI coach to it to support individuals on a pathway towards economic empowerment.

1742
00:56:07.872 --> 00:56:10.154
It's really about personal development,

1743
00:56:10.454 --> 00:56:17.239
setting a solid foundation so that people become lifelong learners and they have the support and the accountability.

1744
00:56:17.758 --> 00:56:20.100
that keeps them steadily making progress.

1745
00:56:20.580 --> 00:56:21.961
So that's our technology company.

1746
00:56:22.101 --> 00:56:23.721
We're really excited about that.

1747
00:56:24.202 --> 00:56:34.026
And we're pursuing a number of different places where we'll be able to implement this and really reach people at scale because that's what doesn't exist right now.

1748
00:56:34.506 --> 00:56:38.707
Another key part of what we're doing with the technology is when you collect data,

1749
00:56:39.148 --> 00:56:40.468
this is the great thing about data.

1750
00:56:41.068 --> 00:56:44.990
Now you can start seeing the value of certain interventions.

1751
00:56:45.090 --> 00:56:46.530
It either works or it doesn't work,

1752
00:56:46.731 --> 00:56:47.011
right?

1753
00:56:47.410 --> 00:56:49.493
And we don't have enough of that.

1754
00:56:49.972 --> 00:56:50.233
I mean,

1755
00:56:50.253 --> 00:56:50.592
you see,

1756
00:56:50.713 --> 00:56:51.954
that's why there's all this fraud,

1757
00:56:52.034 --> 00:56:52.854
all this abuse.

1758
00:56:52.975 --> 00:56:54.917
Like nobody's been watching.

1759
00:56:55.577 --> 00:56:56.717
So through the technology,

1760
00:56:57.097 --> 00:57:06.945
we're going to take a closer look at what's actually working and make sure that funding goes to those things that work and that people get the support that they really need that we know is going to help them.

1761
00:57:07.405 --> 00:57:08.386
The last part that we have,

1762
00:57:08.405 --> 00:57:09.566
which is tied into that,

1763
00:57:10.047 --> 00:57:10.967
is a foundation.

1764
00:57:11.207 --> 00:57:12.810
We have Legacy Impact Foundation.

1765
00:57:13.289 --> 00:57:14.610
The foundation was formed.

1766
00:57:14.791 --> 00:57:17.252
to make sure that those who can't afford the technology,

1767
00:57:17.992 --> 00:57:20.332
that we're able to do it through philanthropic dollars,

1768
00:57:20.392 --> 00:57:20.972
government grants,

1769
00:57:21.012 --> 00:57:21.852
whatever that looks like,

1770
00:57:22.193 --> 00:57:24.573
because we know how valuable it is to have that support.

1771
00:57:25.394 --> 00:57:26.793
And the other part,

1772
00:57:27.034 --> 00:57:30.235
like that friend of mine that I told you got the immediate release,

1773
00:57:30.816 --> 00:57:33.495
he walked out the door greatest day of his life and then it's like,

1774
00:57:33.535 --> 00:57:33.776
okay,

1775
00:57:33.896 --> 00:57:34.457
now what,

1776
00:57:35.396 --> 00:57:35.637
right?

1777
00:57:35.856 --> 00:57:36.316
He was like,

1778
00:57:36.537 --> 00:57:37.798
I have no way to get around.

1779
00:57:38.038 --> 00:57:39.977
I have a great place to stay with family.

1780
00:57:40.498 --> 00:57:41.499
My sister's working.

1781
00:57:41.939 --> 00:57:42.239
Thank you.

1782
00:57:42.450 --> 00:57:43.251
I don't have a vehicle.

1783
00:57:43.291 --> 00:57:44.092
I don't have a license.

1784
00:57:44.093 --> 00:57:45.312
I don't have my social security card.

1785
00:57:45.771 --> 00:57:46.533
How am I going to do this?

1786
00:57:46.972 --> 00:57:49.034
My partner and I helped him get an Uber,

1787
00:57:49.494 --> 00:57:49.694
right?

1788
00:57:49.734 --> 00:57:51.315
Get them all set up with his phone,

1789
00:57:51.374 --> 00:57:51.935
with Uber.

1790
00:57:52.515 --> 00:57:53.374
And there's a lot of,

1791
00:57:53.995 --> 00:57:54.236
you know,

1792
00:57:54.236 --> 00:57:55.535
there's supports out there,

1793
00:57:55.876 --> 00:57:57.457
but there's gaps in our system.

1794
00:57:57.997 --> 00:58:00.859
So we formed a foundation to help fill those gaps,

1795
00:58:00.999 --> 00:58:06.200
to make sure that people had everything that they needed to get up and running because we want to see them succeed.

1796
00:58:06.620 --> 00:58:08.861
So when these are all based on our experiences,

1797
00:58:09.401 --> 00:58:11.543
the things that we know work.

1798
00:58:12.171 --> 00:58:17.012
And also being very realistic about the challenges that everyone's going to face coming out of the system.

1799
00:58:17.453 --> 00:58:18.914
Regardless of good intentions,

1800
00:58:19.534 --> 00:58:23.436
you need to have a solid plan and specific supports in place.

1801
00:58:23.756 --> 00:58:26.617
So that's what we get to do with the people,

1802
00:58:26.736 --> 00:58:27.637
with the technology,

1803
00:58:28.077 --> 00:58:30.198
and with the organizations in the community that are doing that.

1804
00:58:31.899 --> 00:58:32.479
It's pretty cool.

1805
00:58:32.958 --> 00:58:33.520
It's very cool.

1806
00:58:34.300 --> 00:58:34.959
It's pretty cool.

1807
00:58:35.260 --> 00:58:36.581
And it's something that,

1808
00:58:36.640 --> 00:58:36.860
I mean,

1809
00:58:36.921 --> 00:58:38.422
I hope you live another hundred years.

1810
00:58:38.462 --> 00:58:39.141
but I think that

1811
00:58:40.101 --> 00:58:41.163
I know that...

1812
00:58:42.903 --> 00:58:44.104
And I'm going to get it wrong because

1813
00:58:44.784 --> 00:58:45.724
I'm not a big God guy,

1814
00:58:45.725 --> 00:58:46.704
but it's something like,

1815
00:58:47.605 --> 00:58:48.164
you've done well,

1816
00:58:48.185 --> 00:58:49.325
my good and faithful servant.

1817
00:58:49.825 --> 00:58:51.185
And you're doing that now,

1818
00:58:52.126 --> 00:58:52.546
my friend.

1819
00:58:52.766 --> 00:58:53.306
You're doing it now.

1820
00:58:53.586 --> 00:58:54.006
Thank you.

1821
00:58:54.686 --> 00:58:55.167
Awesome.

1822
00:58:57.727 --> 00:58:58.367
In a few months,

1823
00:58:58.566 --> 00:59:02.869
if there's stuff that goes on and you want to come back and we could have an update on things,

1824
00:59:03.729 --> 00:59:04.069
awesome.

1825
00:59:05.789 --> 00:59:08.730
But the chair is always open for you.

1826
00:59:08.850 --> 00:59:09.530
This has been great.

1827
00:59:09.590 --> 00:59:09.950
Thank you.

1828
00:59:10.631 --> 00:59:10.751
Well,

1829
00:59:10.791 --> 00:59:11.570
thank you for having me.

1830
00:59:11.771 --> 00:59:13.061
This has been a great conversation.

1831
00:59:13.182 --> 00:59:13.584
Good stuff.